Then there was Joyce - sitting at the Crystal Peaks tram stop with me for three trams that never came. Good heavens - that woman could talk but most of what came out of her mouth was negative, gloomy and accusatory. Don't get me wrong - I am not saying that she was a bad or despicable person but the way she looked at life was corrosive.
The local council was wrong about everything, the government was wrong about everything and so were the young, along with her neighbours, the police and the homeless. I tried to butt in with my more positive view of the world and the people who are in it but Joyce simply did not want to know.
You find that with some strangers don't you? Well, I do anyway. You listen to their life stories and their philosophies and they want to know nothing about you - no questions, no curiosity. For half an hour, I was in Joyceworld and Puddingworld had been plunged into nothingness.
Joyce pulled out her smartphone and showed me pictures of her family. She brightened and even smiled with love and pride before berating maternity services with regard to her baby granddaughter and the crises she had suffered before getting out of hospital. Then there was her grown up granddaughter who joined the police service in Manchester and now brings back to her nan deliciously grim tales about the criminal activity she encounters.
In Joyceworld, those police stories seemed to simply confirm that the world has already gone to hell in a handcart.
I prefer the Christines of this world whose kindness and positivity surrounded her like an aura. She also showed interest in me - a complete stranger - asking me several friendly questions. In contrast, and I used to find this in teaching, persistent grumblers like Joyce can infect you, bringing you down.
You meet some losers from time to time. You were trapped and had no where to go. Negative people seem to pick out who they can have for a captive audience.
ReplyDeleteI bet that you are a good listener - just like me Red. It may have something to do with our long careers as teachers.
DeleteYou're right about the value of a positive outlook and an active interest in other people!
ReplyDeleteTo some folk, other people are merely objects or decorations.
DeleteJoyce did not live up to her name, it sees. Who knows what bad things happened to her when she was young, circumstances she had no control over, to make her the person you met. I know the type; they really don't want to hear anything positive, and aren't interested in whatever someone else can contribute to a conversation, as long as it does not confirm their view of the world.
ReplyDeleteChristine sounds like the kind of person I strive to be. My general outlook on life is positive, but of course I am realistic and know that things don't always go well, and for way too many people on this planet (children included), life is hell. But what good there is needs to be brought to the fore, and when I can do this even within my tiny bubble, it is something of a victory.
Try to look for the goodness I say.
DeleteYou are so right.
ReplyDeleteI am right about absolutely everything Traveller... just like you!
Deletecouldn't agree more - we had a super positive experience today with a health centre receptionist - a total contrast to her colleague whom we encountered 3 weeks ago - a real gatekeeper, unhelpful and slightly curt.
ReplyDeleteIt is good to acknowledge those who radiate kindness, optimism and respect.
DeleteThere are not enough Christine's in this world these days. I have a friend who is, sadly, a Joyce. No matter how upbeat I am she will always try to convince me that being miserable is the way to go! I live in hope that one day I'll persuade her to look on the bright side!
ReplyDeleteSomehow the grumpy ones seem to relish their grumpiness.
DeleteI had a colleague who was eternally grumpy and his name has become a shorthand for any grumpy person. Little does he realise how much it defines him.
ReplyDeleteI wonder how Joyce got to be how she is. And I wonder if Christine's name carries a hint at her attitude
Maybe you should have also been christened Christine Kylie!
DeleteI suppose you are always going to meet the optimists and pessimists in life. It wouldn't do if we were all the same, although time spent in a pessimist's company can be draining.
ReplyDeleteYes - it can infect you if you are not careful.
DeleteI have a hard time with negative people. It cannot ALL be bad,
ReplyDeleteI have cut ties with friends who have nothing nice to say.
Now, as sarcastic as I am, and I am, I am quite a happy mostly positive person, believe it or not! ๐๐๐
Your "Why Is It?" posts suggest that you are the most grumpy human being that ever walked upon the face of the earth. I guess it's all a disguise.
DeleteI have been accused of being very Christine like. Oh well. Anytime I see a young person and think, why is she dressed like that, what are all of the tattos about, why did he do that to his hair, I remember that I was young once, and hair and clothes were one way I could asset an identity. My father was grumbling about "young people these days" and my grandmother proceeded to tell me all of the things he did when he was growing up, that made his father say the same things.
ReplyDeleteWith that beard, you don't look much like a Christine David.
DeleteI wouldn't have known what to say. I rarely talk much with strangers, well, except maybe in contexts where socialising is expected... But not randomly like when just waiting for a bus etc.
ReplyDeleteI frequently find myself talking with strangers. I am a good listener.
Delete