The law should state that...
...every worker is entitled to an extra day off on his or her birthday.
...every person qualified to vote must do so in local and national elections.
...every citizen is entitled to an annual carbon footprint allowance that must not be exceeded. (Size of allowance to be determined by a committee of climate and environmental experts).
...the sale, purchase and use of tobacco products is prohibited along with all vapes and vaping products.
...politicians must not work beyond the age of seventy - retirement being compulsory at that age.
...road surfacing contractors must have their work inspected after two years. If there is significant deterioration then they must fully reimburse the authorities who paid them.
...use of smartphones while driving will prohibit offenders from owning or using another smartphone for twelve months.
...those spammers who advertise products or services via blog comments should be hunted down and jailed for a minimum of six months.
...the wearing of red "MAGA" caps is illegal.
...anyone driving a brand new Nissan Juke is entitled to receive free petrol for life.
...when apprehended, Boris Johnson is to be be given a compulsory vasectomy.
...anyone caught deliberately dropping litter must work as an unpaid refuse collector for one full week under the instructions of their local council.
...all privately owned guns in America's fifty states must be surrendered to the authorities for disposal as gun ownership is phased out.
... reality TV programmes are hereby banned.
... in wealthy, western countries homelessness is illegal with the guilty parties being not the homeless themselves but the authorities who fail to ensure that every human in their orbit has a roof over their head and somewhere safe to sleep.
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Mr Pudding welcomes all genuine comments - even those with which he disagrees. However, puerile or abusive comments from anonymous contributors will continue to be given the short shrift they deserve. Any spam comments that get through Google/Blogger defences will also be quickly deleted.