17 July 2025

Neighbours

We have lived on this street for thirty six years. There have been many comings and goings. Generally, it is a quiet, law-abiding street where residents look after their homes and show good manners towards each other. In thirty six years, you get to know people while often maintaining a polite distance.

Immediately next to us there's Joseph and Mary. Now in their eighties, they have been perfect next door neighbours. We attended  the weddings of two of their grown-up children and they came to Frances and Stew's wedding in August 2019. Joseph was an academic in the metallurgy department of The University of Sheffield and Mary was a primary school teacher. The only time we ever really hear them is when Joseph is practising his french horn. He is in a local brass band. As time has passed, Mary has become noticeably less mobile as arthritis claims yet another victim. She and I share the same birthday.

On the other side there's Wally and Dolly and their teenage daughters Molly and Polly. They arrived in 2007 and though I am not fond of them they are generally quiet people - except when he's engaged in one of his D.I.Y projects that always involves a lot of banging. During the main COVID lockdown in 2020, he decided to build a big shed at the bottom of their garden which meant that on many of those lovely warm days I could not sit outside reading. Too much sawing, hammering and drilling. They call that shed their studio but in the past five years they have hardly used it.

Directly opposite us there's Carol and Nigel and their teenage daughters Lucy and Laura. Actually the girls were not conceived with Nigel's kind assistance. Fourteen years ago, their blood father Maurice the laser scientist hooked up with a German work colleague and buggered off to Southampton to live with her. Lucy has special needs and is on the autism spectrum. She is picked up by a taxi driver every morning and brought home by taxi in the late afternoon. Her special school is twenty five miles away. The school fees and the taxi bills are all paid for by cash-strapped Sheffield City Council.

On the other side of Joseph and Mary lives a German woman called Hanna and her teenage son Lukas. His electrician father did a Maurice several years ago - buggering off with his new fancy woman.  Hanna is lovely and when Lukas was little I used to whistle the theme tune to "Postman Pat" when I knew he was playing in his garden. A kind of magic through the hedges. He remembers it to this day.

On the other side of Wally and Dolly there's Gertrude who has lived in the same house for sixty years. She is ninety now and gradually, like Mary, being claimed by the arthritis beast. She has always had an upbeat, cheerful attitude to life but nowadays you can see the pain in her eyes. I hope to god that that nasty creature does not get me or Shirley as more years trundle by. Stay away Arthur Itis! Not wanted here!

Very often when I go to our back door to put vegetable waste or teabags in our compost caddy, I think of Sharon who lived just a few doors away. One evening she was doing the same when she tumbled down her outdoor concrete steps and broke several bones - including her skull. She was never the same again and was dead within three years - at the age of seventy.

There are many more pieces of information I could convey about our neighbours but  I am drawing a line at this point...↓ ↓ ↓
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We never really choose our neighbours do we? People randomly come together - often for years on end. On the whole, I think Shirley and I have been pretty lucky with our neighbours. None of them ever behaved as if they came from Hell though they might not say the same of us!

P.S. In case you had not guessed, for privacy reasons, all actual neighbours' names were replaced in this blogpost.

30 comments:

  1. I've known some very colourful neighbours over the years, very colourful indeed. Most of them were decent enough, despite many mental/physical difficulties, poverty, addictions, chequered pasts or minor criminality. Hmmm, I should really do a blog series some day.

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    1. The neighbours could blog about you Debra... unless they ask for bribes.

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  2. If you have neighbor from hell for while you really appreciate the good neighbors. It doesn't take much to show that you care. If we know neighbors names , it shows we care.

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    1. A hellish neighbour can make one's life very miserable. I hope that you and Jean are not hellish.

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  3. Did Wally and Dolly and Molly and Polly have a cat named Olly or a bird named Lolly?
    We have, and have had, mostly nice neighbors around; one one side a woman, whose husband passed just last year, and she is a bit nutty.

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    1. You will easily be able to relate to her then Bob.

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  4. It's true you can't pick your neighbours, but if you know some areas are "unsavoury" you can avoid moving there at least. You've been lucky to have such good neighbours for so long.

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    1. We have never had any neighbours from South Australia.

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  5. Children are often the glue that holds neighbourly relations together. That's certainly been the case for me as a childless tenant and was certainly the case in my childhood (though I think active neighbourliness has declined generally since then).

    Adults learn reserve and but for children there is little reason to establish a connection beyond maintaining civility about bins, fences etc or exchanging notes about a problem neighbour (which is when the politics can begin). And then there can be sources of friction.

    Our neighbours on one side for the past 9 years recently moved out. They were quite friendly when we moved in, in part I think because they had school-aged children, but when they left although things had always been civil they didn't actually say goodbye. We suspect that over time we pissed them off, most likely because we tend to be up late and the wife (who has a high-powered job and whose bedroom was close to our living area) gets up very early. There was a complaint (transmitted by the husband) about late night phone calls (a time-zone issue, especially in the case of my sister in London) interrupting her sleep, after which we tried to conduct such calls from elsewhere in the house, but the damage was done.

    Conversely, their small and ever-barking dog was a source of irritation on our side.

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    1. In English cities, as you probably know, only the affluent get to live in detached houses. I think that a detached home would suit my psychology much better in spite of the fact that we can't really complain about our neighbours. Couldn't you have slyly poisoned their yapping dog? Here Fido!

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  6. I would never have guessed that you made up the names :-D
    In October of this year, it'll be 23 years that I have been living in this flat, and for much of that time with the same neighbours. Our half of the semi holds 4 flats (one of which is illegal, but not my responsibility) and the other half has 3 like ours should, too. Children have been born to those families, some have moved out, but there has always been a core of two families. Out of all of the people in the 7 flats, there are two Germans; myself and the woman in the ground floor flat on my side of the semi. Everyone else is Turkish, Syrian or Iranian. Apart from some communication difficulties because some of them not speaking (much) German, things are ok; the family with two little ones above me in the attic flat can be very noisy, but that's only "kids' noise", not loud music or shouting.

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    1. Living in such close proximity to such neighbours, the tolerance you normally show is vital.

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  7. Yes, Wally, Dolly, Molly and Polly did rather give the name game away!
    We have always had decent neighbours, though last weekend the lady next door( they have been there over 30 years) had someone in who seemed to be trying to get through the adjoining wall to us for most of the day...no prior warning or apology!

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    1. I forget to mention their poodle...Ollie. Once can better tolerate noisy work next door when one has been politely forewarned.

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  8. I love your choice of names Wally, Dolly, Molly and Polly!! My neighbours are ewaully intriguing. I wrote about them here.... https://alcoholicdaze.blogspot.com/search?q=neighbours

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    1. I just went back and read your post Addy. How lovely that you also have a pretty positive attitude towards your neighbours.

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  9. I wrote a similar post some years ago, but it wasn't very flattering, so deleted it. It would have been problematic if Mrs. Rat Poison had found it and recognised herself.

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    1. What a horrid way to write about your wife Tasker!

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  10. Horses have Naybers.

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  11. I know several people in the building, one dear neighbor down the hall, but I have no idea who lives next door. A quiet single women to the right, to the left is a rental - the last I knew it was a military officer on a temporary assignment.

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    1. Maybe you should bake a cherry pie and go next door with it. "Hi! My name is David and I am your next door neighbour. I thought it was about time we got to know each other!"

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  12. Well, I can certainly identify with your complaints about Wally. I think COVID drove a lot of people to embark on crazy projects. You know many more of your neighbors than I do ours. I couldn't even begin to tell you who lives across the street, and we've been here 11 years!

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    1. Sheffield is a much friendlier city than London and you and Dave could probably afford to buy a nice house up here.

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  13. I live on a cul de sac that has 10 houses and we've had quite a few different neighbors over the years. We used to live in the first house on the corner but then moved 2 doors down and across the street to a larger house on the cul de sac. I'm friendly to all of the neighbors but I don't know all of the names and I don't know all of the details of their lives as you seem to do.

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    1. I don't know all the names Ellen and some I only know by their first names.

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  14. when i first moved here the neighbours were great..... 20 years later i'm surrounded by nobheads!

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    1. You mean they wear purple swimming caps?

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  15. It's good to know your neighbours. Ours are pleasant but they know us as well as we know them - that is, very superficially.

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    1. How can that be when you are clearly not a superficial person Janice?

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Mr Pudding welcomes all genuine comments - even those with which he disagrees. However, puerile or abusive comments from anonymous contributors will continue to be given the short shrift they deserve. Any spam comments that get through Google/Blogger defences will also be quickly deleted.

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