Young men are often portrayed as sexual predators. In relationships with young women, they are apparently only after "one thing". Drunken, leering louts, laughing about their conquests and using rude or sexist words to describe women - that's young men. Or is it?
Yesterday, I walked into the city centre to watch "Everest" at The Showroom Cinema. Just before I got there a young man came alongside me and I noticed that he was carrying a bunch of roses. He asked me the time and I told him twelve thirty.
We walked a few steps further on and cheekily, indicating the flowers, I said to him, "It's not Valentine's Day you know!"
"I know but I've got a date in Doncaster. It's our first date. I'm off to catch the train," he said.
"Is it a blind date?"
"No. I've known her a long time but only as a friend. This is different and to tell you the truth mate, I'm a bit nervous!"
"Well I hope it goes well. The fact you already know her should help. You never know, she could be Miss Right!"
"I hope so."
"Good luck!"
And I watched him scurrying onwards to the railway station, roses clasped in his right hand and the hope of love in his heart. He did not fit the caricature of a loutish sexual predator. He was vulnerable, unfulfilled and he was seeking happiness through the magic of a loving relationship. It was a morning that promised so much for him - if she felt the same. And I do believe that that is how most young men really are.
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"Everest" was a stunning film that gives the onlooker a breathtaking sense of the size, rugged geology and inhospitable weather of that mighty mountain. It also touches upon some of the reasons that drive climbers to tackle it despite the dangers it presents. I have always liked films like "Everest" - about adventure and human beings in challenging situations - cinematic interpretations of real life stories. In contrast, I happily admit that I have never seen or wanted to see any James Bond film nor any "Star Wars" film either. Just not my cups of tea.
Well I hope the young man didn't have his hopes dashed. My boy falls really hard when his heart is broken.
ReplyDeleteTo share a funny story though between him and a mate today ~ we went to the hardware shop where his mate works to buy a new garden hose. And they exchanged greetings and shook hands and his mate said to him, assuming the role of a saesman, "What can I help you with today Sir? I think we are all sold out in the Girlfriend Department". Mates eh?
Apart from the garden hose, was there anything in stock for you Carol?
DeleteI didn't check to be honest. The garden hoses happened to be on special at the front door, so I walked in and straight back out via the checkout. But a hardware shop would be a good place for me to "cruise" on the weekend wouldn't it?
DeleteYes. Tough and handsome men tend to hang out at hardware stores Carol. Pity they are not on the shelves.
DeleteAwwwwwwwwwwww
ReplyDeleteI felt exactly the same way John.
DeleteYP, I didn't know you were such a romantic! No doubt you've left out the part where you were so overcome by lovely thoughts that you ran right out and brought roses as a surprise for the wifey! My husband has not brought me flowers in decades, but he does bring me chocolate whenever he goes to Costco (big warehouse shopping)!
ReplyDeleteYorkshiremen tend not to be romantic like poncey Frenchies or Londoners. We are rough and tough and we don't waste money on dying flowers unless we have done something wrong or we are after something.
DeleteWords was too big a subject for my little brain to condense it into a meaningful response. Wandering around wastelands really isn't my scene. On the topic of this post it is gratifying to be able to be able to simply agree that that is how most young men really are. The majority are so often damned by the few.
ReplyDeleteThank you for replying Graham. I was beginning to think that the Lewisites had finally driven you into the sea for being an in-comer!
DeleteNIce story! I haven't seen the Everest film but I must say I am definitely NOT of a mind to be a mountain climber. :)
ReplyDeleteI don't mind scaling hills like those we have in the Lake District but I wouldn't want to put my life at risk or get frostbitten fingers and toes.
DeleteWell, I know I am an old hippie but I have never understood why guys get a bad reputation for being sexual predators. Young and older adults of both genders have the same needs and wants and desires, whether for love or sex or both. If young men (or older men, for that matter) display there needs in ways that are disgusting or obvious, then I would put the blame on those who raised them for not instructing them on how to treat women.
ReplyDeleteGood point Mama Thyme. How people behave is largely the product of their upbringing and the role models they have emulated.
DeleteNot long ago there was an article in my weekly paper about sex and how our over-sexed (Western) societies have done a lot of damage. A study among young people showed that young men are often rather afraid of young women/girls; everyone thinks they have to "perform" because they see all that unrealistic c_ _ p on the internet and elsewhere and dread not living up to expectations.
ReplyDeleteA bit of nervousness and hearts beating faster sounds nice and romantic; I am glad this kind of situation is still happening. Men/boys and women/girls aren't all that different there, I think; there are the rude, blunt ones as well as the romantic, sensitive ones in both sexes.
You are right but mostly I think that young men and young women are rather fragile. They may put on masks but beneath it all there's a need to feel comfort, connection and love. The internet has removed much of the mystery and mystique about intimacy as you rightly suggest.
DeleteThat's a lovely story. The majority of time we only hear about the bad deeds done by some in society...rarely do we hear heartwarming stories such as this one. I hope the young man's feelings and hopes are reciprocated. Somehow, I think they will be.
ReplyDeleteThey've begun with a good solid base of friendship...young love is wonderful...love at any age is wonderful. :)
I don't suppose that I will ever find out what happened after that first date but I would like to think that they get together, marry, have a couple of kids and live happily ever after. I like stories that go that way.
DeleteMe, too. :)
DeleteYou have a very positive story about hope. I've read a few good books on Everest. I liked into thin air.
ReplyDeleteSo I think you would really enjoy the film Red! Treat yourself. Go to see it if it is still listed at your local cinema or get the DVD from Father Christmas!
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