Become your favourite politician! Vladimir Putin.
Mask-arade face masks are Fantastic Fun for any occasion. These flat, printed cardboard face masks are guaranteed to turn heads, create smiles and laughter and get your party off to the greatest start.
All Mask-arade stock face masks are manufactured using the latest print technology and only use responsibly sourced, high quality FSC white card. All masks come with eye holes and attached elastic.
I wonder which party they are referring to? The Communist Party?
It is rumoured that Putin has his own personal supply of these masks. If he hasn't shaved or looks bedraggled after a late vodka-fuelled night playing "Fortnite" on his phone, he simply dons a new mask. As his face is usually expressionless and his lips hardly move, nobody notices when he is wearing one of these masks.
Donald Trump and Boris Johnson masks are also available from the same supplier but for them you need an exceptionally large head - about the size of a basketball. In contrast, Putin is a weenie little fellow with wedges in his heels to make him look taller. He is exactly the same height as Adolf Hitler was. He also suffered from LMS (Little Man Syndrome).
I wonder if wearing a Putin mask will get me seat on a tram.ReplyDelete
No but it might get you a job in McDonalds.Delete
He seems a nice, unassuming chap.ReplyDelete
There's no disPutin that comment.Delete
You don't find him attractive then?Delete
I often pondered that Putin must have been a stone cold killer back in the day. I just can't imagine someone of his puny stature getting to where he is at any other way. I would not want to work for the guy for fear of living up to the "Hotel California" lyric by the Eagles. "You can check out anytime you like but you can never leave."ReplyDelete
Instead of deliberately creating a pointless war in which other people will die, Putin should be marshalling Russia's resources in order to suppress the COVID pandemic. Over 135,000 new infections were registered in Russia today with 800 more deaths.Delete
That's a killer mask. Haha!ReplyDelete
You are damned right! It is a killer mask in more ways than one!Delete
Another generation of children will be traumatized by a pointless war because Putin didn't get enough attention as a child or perhaps because he has a small dick. It makes me sick.ReplyDelete
As I said to Ed (above) he ought to be concentrating on Russia's ongoing COVID crisis. Incidentally, his penis is 3.7cm long according to Wikipedia. He calls it Lukashenko.Delete
And the Hitler comparisons don't stop there! This whole situation is terrifying.ReplyDelete
There used to be a playground song in England:-Delete
Hitler has only got one ball
The other is in The Albert Hall
His brother - the silly bugger
Hasn't got any balls at all,
There were several variations but that is the one that I remember. I don't suppose schoolchildren sing it any more.
A good number of them do not know who Hitler is.Delete
I hope you mean "was" Graham! Hell, he'd be 132 now!Delete
Oh dear, who am I to criticise those who misuse the English language when I can not even get my tenses correct? Fortunately Hitler never made it that far!Delete
Little man syndrome indeed. Napoleon, Hitler, Mussolini, Franco and now Putin. I can see a trend here.ReplyDelete
Johnson is pretty short too.Delete
3.7 cm - really....um, dare I ask who provided those measurements?ReplyDelete
So yet another little man with big ideas of taking over the world at the expense of millions of innocent lives. Napoleon was such another - as was Mussolini. If we look back in history, how many warmongers were just puny little men? Perhaps there should be a height restriction for male politicians in future? No wedge heels allowed!
I believe the measurement was taken by Putin's nanny.Delete
From the blurb, I take it that the elastic is neither high quality nor responsibly sourced.ReplyDelete
I know you like to demonstrate your keen sense of environmental responsibility when buying masks. Do you still wear your Jacob Rees-Mogg mask when working on factorials?Delete
Seems a bit too scary even for Halloween...ReplyDelete
There should be a health warning: "NOT TO BE WORN IN FRONT OF CHILDREN OR ADULTS OF A NERVOUS DISPOSITION"Delete
What an appalling thing to be manufactured! I certainly don't want one.ReplyDelete
Walking round the mean streets of Adelaide in a Putin mask, you would receive many complimentary wolf whistles River.Delete
In 2015, I went on a trip to China. One day, I found myself outside a wax museum in Lijiang. There was a full-sized wax model of Putin so I had my photo taken next to it. I am 5ft 6 inches tall and he was about 4 or 5 inches taller. (Maybe not a true rendering). in those days Rachel used to blog about Putin's fantasy life with his girlfriend (Natasha?) so I emailed the photo to her, saying "Look who I met today!" Her reply, which mentioned Putin by name, was censored by the Chinese authorities and never arrived.ReplyDelete
In reality, Putin is only an inch taller than you Margaret. Did he have a wick on top of his wax head? You should have lit it then you would have literally melted his heart.Delete