Every Sunday I go to the quiz at our local pub. There's a prize kitty. It sits in a safe and to win it you have to guess the code. There are two hundred numbers to pick from and each week the kitty builds up. Tonight, I had a winning line on my Bingo-like quiz sheet, 
so I went up to the bar fully intending to opt for the £10 winner's prize and forfeiting my chance to go for the safe. But the quizmaster - Leeds Mick - was persuasive and reluctantly I chose to try the safe. On the sheet, there were all these crossed out numbers staring back at me, but the number 136 was sitting on its own. I went for it. Leeds Mick tapped in the numbers and lo and behold - I won! How much? Two hundred quid - that's all! Two hundred f-ing notes! Yo! But as I always sit with Roy and Mike, I had to split it three ways and then there was ten quid for Neil and Dave's table to get some drinks and ten for Richard, Stan and Gibby - leaving me with £60 to bring home. Holy Mother of God! Such moments are rare. It almost made up for seeing Hull City unluckily lose their third home match of the season against a dull Coventry team, 1-0. This sixty quid will come in very handy when I jet off to Berlin on Tuesday - I might keep it to spend on a brilliant German meal of sausages and sauerkraut with black bread and a stein of Munchen beer. Some people are losers but tonight, I'm a winner! Autographs later! TWO HUNDRED! Yaaaaay!
so I went up to the bar fully intending to opt for the £10 winner's prize and forfeiting my chance to go for the safe. But the quizmaster - Leeds Mick - was persuasive and reluctantly I chose to try the safe. On the sheet, there were all these crossed out numbers staring back at me, but the number 136 was sitting on its own. I went for it. Leeds Mick tapped in the numbers and lo and behold - I won! How much? Two hundred quid - that's all! Two hundred f-ing notes! Yo! But as I always sit with Roy and Mike, I had to split it three ways and then there was ten quid for Neil and Dave's table to get some drinks and ten for Richard, Stan and Gibby - leaving me with £60 to bring home. Holy Mother of God! Such moments are rare. It almost made up for seeing Hull City unluckily lose their third home match of the season against a dull Coventry team, 1-0. This sixty quid will come in very handy when I jet off to Berlin on Tuesday - I might keep it to spend on a brilliant German meal of sausages and sauerkraut with black bread and a stein of Munchen beer. Some people are losers but tonight, I'm a winner! Autographs later! TWO HUNDRED! Yaaaaay!
Excellent!
ReplyDeleteI was VERY tempted to make a heartless, cruel comment about losers and winners, but I'm in such a gregarious mood that I'll forgo the jibes just for this morning. Congratulations, old chap.
ReplyDeleteI don't know you YP, I know nothing about you other than what you put on this blog and I don't even know if it is all made up - so why the fuck am I very happy for you this minute?
ReplyDeleteNice one, big man, and enjoy Berlin!
Sorry Mr McReidski, you can sweet talk me as much as you like but you ain't getting ANY of my money!
ReplyDeleteThanks to Georgie for her verdict on my biceps.
And to Bradley the Friendly Gorilla, I am grateful you reined in your barbed wit to voice much deserved congratulations from your dungeon in Banana City.
I hope it doesn't change you YP
ReplyDeletedo I need to write the begging letter on behalf of my little niece on dialysis for her kidney transplant fund or can I just do it through here? she often talks about that nice mr pudding, when she has the strength to talk at all that is, your blog is the only thing that keeps her going, I know you won't let her down...
Just hand over the cash or you're getting a Glasgow kiss!
ReplyDeleteNow, about that round you were going to buy for your faithful readers...
ReplyDeleteI've grown a new liking to Glenfiddich and Glenmorangie. Neat, please.
ReplyDeleteCongrats! Will you rub my head for good luck so I can maybe win a bit on the lotto?
I look forward to finding out how you eventually did end up spending your winnings!
ReplyDeleteI found 5 dollars in a paperback book at a used book-store, once. It felt magical. What did I buy with it? Another book!
Hello y'all! Back from Berlin where I spent the money on train tickets, a German meal of potato soup, mashed potato and pigs' liver in apple with caramelised onions all washed down with a stein of Berliner lager. Now the money's all gone so please no more begging!
ReplyDelete