8 November 2011

Ratification

When we ultra-civilised members of the blogging community form our own gated and perfect world, residents must sign up to our code of conduct. I provided six opening rules in my last post and here are a further eight, adapted from the the comments of John Gray (Going Gently), Ian (Shooting Parrots) and Daphne (My Dad's a Communist):-
  1. No spitting in public places or in full view of other citizens. If you must spit, do it in private.
  2. If you do not possess a disabled drivers' badge, you most definitely must not park in any bays that are clearly reserved for disabled fellow citizens as that could be injurious to their well-being.
  3. If you must masticate chewing gum, dispose of it sensibly and hygienically. Wrap it in paper and toss it in the nearest waste-bin.
  4. If you are a parent, make sure that you exercise good control of your children in public. Allowing them to scream and run around like little animals is socially unacceptable.
  5. If you are a cyclist, do not ride your bike on the pavement or disregard traffic lights.
  6. If attending the cinema or theatre, get there early, ready for the start of the performance and do not speak or eat noisily during the show.
  7. Stop what you are doing when a funeral cort├Ęge passes.
  8. Do as you would be done by (Do unto others as you would have done unto yourself)
These additional rules were all ratified by the standards committee, chaired by Senator R. Brague at the inaugural conference of the "Blogland Development Corporation" where it was revealed that billionaire benefactors have already pledged enormous sums of money to help us to establish our dream world. Further rules will be considered if you have other suggestions.

5 comments:

  1. Oh my oh my I don't really want to start in case I cannot stop but what about INDICATING when you are in the car and turning???? and saying THANK YOU if someone holds a door open for you?? and not LITTERING?????...ahem...going to go and have a cup of tea and a calm down.

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  2. here here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  3. And another thing!

    People who don't acknowledge you with a wave when you slow down to let them pull out of a side street or allow a pedestrian to cross the road.

    Pedestrians who are oblivious to traffic when they cross the road because they're too busy talking on their phones.

    Shoppers who rudely point at what they want in a shop because they're on their phones.

    Drivers who seem to think that red traffic lights are advisory. The same people who drive with their fog lights on even though it isn't.

    People who haven't worked out that the words 'entrance' and 'exit' on the doors of the supermarket actually mean something and try going in through the out door.

    Women (it's invariably women) who seem surprised to be asked for payment when their shopping is done and spend several minutes rummaging through their handbag for their purse.

    I don't think this is doing my blood pressure any good!

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  4. I especially like number 4. For godness sake parents start controlling your children when they are small. It will make their life and the life of everyone around them for the next 25 years a lot easier ( and more pleasant )!!!
    You are doing a great job here YP
    Cheers

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  5. I came late to yesterday's party, so I will reiterate part of what I said in an earlier comment and perhaps add a new thought or two:

    I detest seeing men with their hats (usually baseball caps) on indoors, even in church services.

    In some parts of this everything-and-everybody-is-equal country, holding a door open for a woman could get a man cursed out royally by one of the feminazis of liberal persuasion, as such persons consider it condescending and demeaning to their persons to do so when they are perfectly capable of doing it themselves. This may also apply to their sex lives in some cases.

    You Brits or Englishmen or whatever you are must never, never come to the U.S. with your bicycles as the law of the land here (and it is enforced) is that bicycles MUST be ridden on the pavement and NOT on the sidewalks so that pedestrians will stand a better chance of making it to their destinations.

    I am enjoying this mini-series immensely, Y.P.

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Mr Pudding welcomes all genuine comments - even those with which he disagrees. However, puerile or abusive comments from anonymous contributors will continue to be given the short shrift they deserve. Any spam comments that get through Google/Blogger defences will also be quickly deleted.