|Autumnal morning - rear view from Pudding Towers|
Sir Humphrey Pudding is snoring in the bed chamber, dreaming of Sir Joseph Banks and how he wandered off from Cook's Cove in search of unknown plants or perhaps of the former weather girl and serial Swedish bride - Ulrika Jonsson. Suddenly, bounding into the chamber comes Sir Humphrey's private nurse - Matron Shirley.
Is there a fire? Are there intruders on the estate? She is holding Sir Humphrey's keyhole camera. Matron then flings open the curtains and the shadowy chamber is abruptly filled with morning light. Holding hands, Ulrika and Sir Joseph slink away to Neverland.
"Look! What a lovely morning!" announces Matron Shirley. "I've brought your camera up to get a couple of pictures!"
Wearing only his birthday suit, Sir Humphrey stumbles to the window. Matron's instructions must always be obeyed. Fortunately, there are no neighbours, maids or gardeners out and about in the gardens. The last thing Sir Humphrey wanted was yet another police charge for indecent exposure.
He snaps the pictures as instructed. It is a glorious morning indeed. Matron curtsies and soon departs to the local health centre where on Wednesdays she administers care to the poor and needy.
Sir Humphrey draws the curtains and returns to his slumbers. Unfortunately, Joseph Banks and Ulrika Jonsson do not return. Instead he is driving a jeep across the dusty heartland of the Islamic State, wearing a black bandana with an Arabic slogan emblazoned in white across it. He has no idea what this means. He starts to hum Typically Tropical's hit song, "Barbados" and his fanatic passengers soon join in, waving their machine guns as they head off to the hills in a cloud of dust:-
Woah, I'm going to Barbados
Woah, back to the palm trees
Woah, I'm going to see my girlfriend
Woah, in the sunny Caribbean sea.