14 October 2015

Morning

Autumnal morning - rear view from Pudding Towers
Sir Humphrey Pudding is snoring in the bed chamber, dreaming of Sir Joseph Banks and how he wandered off from Cook's Cove in search of unknown plants or perhaps of the former weather girl and serial Swedish  bride - Ulrika Jonsson. Suddenly, bounding into the chamber comes Sir Humphrey's private nurse - Matron Shirley.

Is there a fire? Are there intruders on the estate? She is holding Sir Humphrey's keyhole camera. Matron then  flings open the curtains and the shadowy chamber is abruptly filled with morning light. Holding hands, Ulrika and Sir Joseph slink away to Neverland.

"Look! What a lovely morning!" announces Matron Shirley. "I've brought your camera up to get a couple of pictures!"

Wearing only his birthday suit, Sir Humphrey stumbles to the window. Matron's instructions must always be obeyed. Fortunately, there are no neighbours, maids or gardeners out and about in the gardens. The last thing Sir Humphrey wanted was yet another police charge for indecent exposure.
He snaps the pictures as instructed. It is a glorious morning indeed. Matron curtsies and soon  departs to the local health centre where on Wednesdays she administers care to the poor and needy.

Sir Humphrey draws the curtains and returns to his slumbers. Unfortunately, Joseph Banks and Ulrika Jonsson do not return. Instead he is driving a jeep across the dusty heartland of the Islamic State, wearing a black bandana with an Arabic slogan emblazoned in white across it. He has no idea what this means. He starts to hum Typically Tropical's hit song, "Barbados" and his fanatic passengers soon join in, waving their machine guns as they head off to the hills in a cloud of dust:-
Woah, I'm going to Barbados 
Woah, back to the palm trees 
Woah, I'm going to see my girlfriend 
Woah, in the sunny Caribbean sea.

16 comments:

  1. Wow! The view from Pudding Towers is stunning!

    Have a wonderful day, good Sir!

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    1. Your wish is my command milady!

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  2. Your rampant imagination keeps us laughing yet again YP. Thank you Matron Shirley for seeing a fabulous photo opportunity in the Autumn morn. We don't have colours like that here in FNQ.

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    1. FNQ? ....Need to Google.... Ah yes, "FNQ - The Brazilian National Quality Foundation - is a non-governmental organization created in 1991 with the mission to disseminate the Fundamentals of Management Excellence. This is done by mobilizing organizations around the Modelo de Excelência da Gestão® MEG (Management Excellence Model), developed along FNQs 17-year old experience related to the National Brazilian Quality Award (PNQ), conferred by the institution.

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  3. My eyes! My eyes! I cannot see the reportedly lovely autumnal morning because I was blinded by the sight of Sir Humphrey Pudding in his birthday suit. Oh, the humanity!

    Mrs. RWP and I are currently spending a few days in the mountains of western North Carolina, and when we return to our home computer I shall have a few autumnal leaves of my own to share.

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    1. Will you be wearing said leaves as Adam did after The Fall?

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  4. It is a bright and beautiful morning. Couldn't matron have taken the pictures to save you getting up?

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    1. Matron knows how to work a washing machine and an iron - even a sewing machine but to her taking a picture with a digital camera is like operating a space module.

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  5. The view from your bedroom window is as nice as the one from my kitchen window, although I must admit I do not have sheep looking at me every time I show my face (or more) at the window.

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    1. No. I bet you have a crowd of Turkish men looking up - all gazing through binoculars - "İşte orada! Güzel kütüphaneci!"

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  6. You've been sniffing those legal highs again

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  7. I'm so thankful you had the camera directed in the right direction, Yorkie!

    What a morning glory!!!

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    1. Babe, I had the camera pointed in the wrong direction!

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  8. You are as mad as the proverbial Hatter - but I laughed, which is according to some sources the best medicine. A very rural outlook on your estate; trees, sheep and nearby an orchard...

    Ms Soup

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    1. Well I am glad I made you chuckle Alphie!

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Mr Pudding welcomes all genuine comments - even those with which he disagrees. However, puerile or abusive comments from anonymous contributors will continue to be given the short shrift they deserve. Any spam comments that get through Google/Blogger defences will also be quickly deleted.