9 December 2015

Shed

Some people take pictures of golden sunrises over palm-fringed beaches. Others take spectacular pictures of panoramas from mountain tops. Some prefer images of pouting models strolling down cat walks while others prefer pictures of toothless toddlers on tartan rugs. Wildlife  photography? Mucky Highland Terriers rolling around in Scottish snow or cute thatched cottages in Dorset?  A grand palace in Ludwigsburg, Germany or a crazy grandson in Alabamistan? The possibilities are endless.

But I prefer pictures of tumbledown sheds like the one featured in this blogpost. I snapped them yesterday while testing out the new boots. It is an old railway freight carriage - minus the wheels. It has stood in a field on the western outskirts of Sheffield for all of the thirty seven years I have lived here. Once used as a stable by a horsey teenage girl who must now be in her forties or fifties, its only current functions are as a shelter for sheep and as a subject for arty farty photographers in new boots.
It is a windswept place in the heart of Britain. Beyond the shed you can see the suburb of Lodge Moor and beyond that, over on the horizon The Bradfield Moors. Having talked to the landowner, I can now reveal that this rustic holiday home will soon be available exclusively to foreign readers of "Yorkshire Pudding" for a knock down price of £315 a week, rising to £543 in the summer. Sleeps six, well-ventilated, this charming country cottage enjoys spectacular views over The Rivelin Valley and is a short drive from Stonehenge and Shakespeare's birthplace. Contact "Yorkshire Pudding Holiday Cottages Ltd" to check availability.

33 comments:

  1. A wonderful shed it is. Much more attractive than Uma Thurman.

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    1. Perhaps you could contact Uma and arrange a weekend break in the shed with her. Remember your Philosan tablets.

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  2. It's certainly scenic, but I think the rent is a bit high.

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    1. For you and Dave, I might be able to negotiate a further discount Steve and of course Olga can stay as well as long as she doesn't savage the sheep in the next field. Pleawe give me your preferred dates.

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  3. Even my grandson in Alabamistan is not crazy enough to take you up on your very lucrative proposition. But the really crazy thing is that my current spiritual advisor, the Reverend Ken H., who has hiked the Appalachian Trail with his teenaged offspring, probably is. I will forward the brochure to him; you should be hearing from him shortly.

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    1. Thank you for the link. Ken H? H is a very short family name. I hope it is not short for Heroin as drugs are not allowed in the shed.

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  4. Perhaps all that wallpaper you have bearing Adrian's image could be used on walls of said shed, both inside and out

    After applying same, I'm sure you could up the rent, for both summer and winter.

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    1. Great idea Lee plus a big framed portrait of Tamborine Mountain's most famous resident and underneath the warning "BIG SISTER IS WATCHING YOU!"

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    2. Consider it done, Yorkie! A large, gilt-framed portrait is in the post...on its way to you. You are a man of so many great ideas! :)

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  5. Even pouting models can eventually end up as derelict wrecks.

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    1. Oh dear, did you marry one Philip? You seem to be speaking from experience.

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    2. Just posing a theoretical possibility.

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    3. Posing? You mean like a model at a photo shoot?

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  6. More seriously, abandoned buildings in the middle of nowhere are appealing. I liked the one of the derelict chapel the other day. Who funded its building? Who used to attend? When was the last service? These are the things I wonder about.

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    1. Regarding that old chapel, please see this link Philip...

      http://www.derbyshireheritage.co.uk/Menu/Buildings/misc/Trinity-Chapel.php

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    2. Thank you. Even more interesting history than I expected.

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  7. Does that low, low price include running water or not?

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    1. No need for running water my dear, there's a big tank of pure Yorkshire rainwater which will serve all of your aquatic requirements.

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  8. Great imagination!

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    1. And I can imagine you there Red with a Canadian flag temporarily flying above the shed, a hurricanee lamp glowing brightly at night and you singing...
      Et ta valeur, de foi trempée,
      Protégera nos foyers et nos droits

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  9. I love your pics.

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    1. Never mind the pics... it's a short drive up from The Midlands Libby. I am sure that you and The Mister would thoroughly enjoy a weekend break in The Shed. You can get fresh eggs from the farm and they may even let you milk the nanny goat!

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  10. Just the sort of thing I like to photograph. Rust and peeling paint has great character. Not that I'd like it at the bottom of my garden mind.

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    1. I understand that your neighbours have been gathering a petition in protest about the mess at the bottom of your garden Ian. Now you have done your time why not clear it up?

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  11. Hmm. Rustic shed, fresh eggs, goat milk. I was tempted for a moment, but no mention of fresh coffee in the morning so I guess I'll look for other accommodations for my next (first?)England vacation. No doubt the mattresses were hard, anyhow.

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    1. No. There are no mattresses Hilly. You have to bring your own mattresses or airbeds. It all adds to the exciting experience of holidaying in The Shed.

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  12. Another timely offer, after you've already come up with the Adrianesque wall paper just when I started thinking about redecorating my bedroom and living room next spring!
    On Monday, my sister asked me to write to the owners of the cottage we usually rent when in Ripon and see when it is available for us next summer. I haven't heard from them yet, so before I book the same old place again, maybe I should grab the opportunity to have The Shed for 2 weeks before someone else snaps it up.

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    1. Yes. I throughly agree with you Meike. In fact, I think you should call or text your sister and say "Sis, don't bother about the Ripon cottage. I have found us somewhere else!" It will be a lovely surprise for her when she arrives at The Shed next summer.

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  13. Words fail me....

    Ms Soup

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    1. Oh dear - are you choking or desperately short of breath? If I were with you I would perform the heimlich manoeuvre upon you Ms Soup Dragon.

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  14. That is one fine shed, in the middle of nowhere, which gives it a more fascinating appeal.

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    1. A philosophical man like you could engender some great ideas in that shed Blogorati. Send deposit to secure holiday rental.

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  15. I've bought my husband The Ladybird Book of the Shed as a surprise Xmas present.

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Mr Pudding welcomes all genuine comments - even those with which he disagrees. However, puerile or abusive comments from anonymous contributors will continue to be given the short shrift they deserve. Any spam comments that get through Google/Blogger defences will also be quickly deleted.