11 June 2017

Wheat

Prior to Britain's very recent General Election, PM Theresa May was interviewed by an experienced ITV journalist called Julie Etchingham. Attempting to delve deeper to find out more about the prime minister's personality, Miss Etchingham asked "What's the naughtiest thing you ever did?"

Theresa May squirmed visibly in her seat, her mouth twisting nervously. It was a question she hadn't anticipated and obviously not one her advisers had prepared her for. There was an uncomfortable pause before Theresa May admitted that when she was a girl, she and her friend used to run through a field of wheat. It was the best she could come up with.

Still grinning uncomfortably she conjectured that the local farmer would have been most unhappy if he had witnessed this terrible behaviour.

There were other ways in which Theresa May could have dealt with this question. For example, she could have bounced it back at Julie Etchingham  saying you tell me yours and I'll tell you mine. Alternatively, she could have said that she found such a question irrelevant ahead of an important election. Instead, she gave her excruciating response that simply added weight to the growing perception that Mrs May is very prim and proper and has a poor connection with ordinary people's lives and is out of her depth. Far from being "strong and stable" she is clearly terribly self-conscious, lacking the common touch. She has been exposed. Not a bad human being but not a natural leader either.

If I was being interviewed on television and an interviewer asked me what was the naughtiest thing I had ever done, many things would flash through my mind. However, I wouldn't wish to share any of them with the watching television audience. Hell, I wouldn't even share the majority of them with Yorkshire Pudding blog visitors. How about you? What's the naughtiest thing you ever did?

25 comments:

  1. I'm not going near your question. I have a long record and it's not all good. Funny how when Dad was in his late 80's early 90's we began to talk about some of these things and dad could laugh about them. But at the time there had been hell to pay and the topic was not brought up.

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    1. It's good that you and your late father got to look back upon those naughty times. I imagine the list was very long as in senior adulthood you seem to be a pretty mischievous guy Red. Good job The Micro Manager is there to keep you on the straight and narrow.

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  2. Hoo boy...I won't be answering that one either. You'll just have to let your imagination run wild! Some things are best not spoken of.

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    1. Don't worry Jennifer, I won't tell anybody about that time long ago when someone passed you a marijuana "joint" and you inhaled a lungful of the mind-bending smoke! You were indeed wild!

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  3. Wouldn't you like to know!

    Perhaps if you hadn't coached us on what the right answer is, you'd be making better headway with this question!

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    1. My Canadian informant has already told me about your wild behaviour in high school Jenny! Do you recall the time you forgot to do your Science homework? Really wild! And the time you wrote "I Love Frank Sinatra" on your pencil case? Really wild!

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  4. That's for me to know and you to find out... but it's not running through a wheat field. There was a cartoon accompanying an article in one of our papers yesterday which I am sure you would approve, featuring the lovely Theresa.

    Alphie

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    1. What sort of fields did you run through Alphie? My guess would be potatoes!

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  5. Yes, I saw that (on both HIGNIFY and The Last Leg) and laughed myself silly.

    I can only think of childhood naughtinesses, and they are too silly to mention. The grown-up ones, I'll keep to myself thank you very much!

    Hmm, note to one T. May: that could have been a useful reply...

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    1. Yes that would have been a great response Rozzie. You should be T.May's new special adviser. You could also talk about shoes!

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  6. Similar to you and to Theresa May, I, too, choose not to share.

    I would've told the interviewer to mind her own bloody business!

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    1. Hell's bells if you had co-operated with the interviewer they would have had to turn your response into a three week mini-series!

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    2. Longer, even....

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  7. Ditto Lee's comments !

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    1. If Julie Etchingham had been interviewing you she would have been taken aback by the many tales of naughtiness stretching right back to the nineteen fifties.

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  8. Normally, unless one has lived a very unexciting and bland life, most people's "worst thing they've done" is a either too embarrasing or too private, to be revealed publicly.

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    1. I have my contacts on The Isle of Sheppey and I am gobsmacked by your colourful record Derek.

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  9. I haven't even admitted them to myself, YP, so I'm certainly not going to tell you. I certainly agree with your assessment of Mrs May. I'm not sure that it will be stronger and more stable when Boris takes over but it will be more fun. It's just a shame that, at the moment, the last thing we want for the governance of this country is fun.

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    1. I don't like to call that oaf "Boris". It is too pally, too affectionate. I always refer to him as Johnson. Johnson is one of the main reasons Britain voted to leave the EU as he sought to engineer his way to the top.

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  10. I love that illustration.

    The thing that leapt into my mind immediately was the time a high school friend and I stole a traffic barricade. It was one of those orange-and-white barricades with the blinking light on top. It had been guarding a pothole beside the highway. She kept it in her closet for years, and it blinked for weeks on end before it finally died. I've often wondered whether someone drove into that pothole later.

    I've probably done naughtier things, as has Ms May, I'm sure, but like you I'd rather not disclose them!

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    1. HO-HO Steve - that reminds me of the time I "borrowed" an oil lamp left by some roadworks by the council. We don't have them any more. I went to bed with that lovely lamp glowing red in my student room. In the morning the lamp was out and my room was filled with oily soot. Served me right! I had even been breathing the black smoke in during my deep, inebriated slumber. But this only comes 221st on my list of naughtiest things.

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  11. Rushed round next door with some tittle tattle I had heard my mother say to my father (about them). It amused them but not my mother and I got my first (only two all my childhood)good hiding.

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    1. Good hiding? Where did you hide? It must be fun to play hide and seek with one's parents.

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  12. Why do you think I go by the name of "Librarian with Secrets" here in the blogosphere?

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  13. I have never purposefully done anything naughty, but occasionally managed to do something that didn't make others happy. When I was 6 my mom bought Venetian blinds and hung them in the living room. I remember being so proud of myself as I cut through the middle of them so neatly with a very sharp pair of scissors. I probably only got through 10 of the slats before my mom came in the room. I remember being very puzzled that she didn't see how neat and even my cuts were. Self-righteousness has always been one of my faults.

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