29 November 2017

Manners

In these modern times, it is sometimes suggested that people have become very self-centred and that basic manners are no longer in evidence.

However, this evening as I stood up to alight from the number 88 bus, everybody who got off at my stop spoke to the driver. It went like this:-
"Thanks mate!"
"Cheers!"
"Thanks a lot!"
"Thanks very much."
"Thanks buddy!"
"Thank you driver."
"Cheers!"
"Thank you."

That last passenger was me.

This is a small part of Yorkshire culture. It is drummed into us in childhood. If somebody has done something for you, provided a service or whatever,  you say thank you. 

I am happy to note that both of our grown-up children continue this laudable tradition. Perhaps selfishness and ignorance are not as prevalent as it is frequently assumed after all.

29 comments:

  1. I always am polite. But then I too am Yorkshire born and bred tho now in the NE of Scotland. Who also have good manners. Where is it then that people no longer do this? House of Commons possibly.

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    1. Anywhere "Down South". They are all ignorant buggers down there apart from Derek Faulkner and ADDY.

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  2. My kids talk about the trains here where nobody gives up a seat, not for someone who is very elderly and struggling, not for a heavily pregnant woman, not for a young man on crutches. They all look at their phones and pretend they don't see.
    Maybe Yorkshire is a m ore polite place or maybe saying thanks is easy but giving up one's seat actually takes effort, I'm not sure. I'm happy I don't catch trains, though

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    1. In Yorkshire we don't think about it. We just give up our seats automatically when a needy passenger has boarded. But in London folk try to blank out all strangers. I guess this unfriendliness is common in capital cities.

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  3. I always extend that courtesy also, Mr. Pudding. But lately-well within the last few years, anyway- those who I speak to in this manner answer with, "No problem", instead of "your welcome". This I do not like. No, I do not like it at all. I would rather they not reply at all. Is this just a trend here in the US? (Please excuse my punctuation, Mr. Pudding. I know it is horrible but my mind is on sewing at the moment.)

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    1. Your mind is on sewing? No problem Mama Bear. But isn't it rather late in the year for sewing seeds? They'll never grow!

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  4. We are mostly civilized here in Canada, too. Except that we have adopted American spelling for some words like "civilized" which probably has cost me a lot of points with you, Mr. Pudding :)

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    1. Are you suggesting that I am pudantic?

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    2. I would have, had I been clever enough to think of it :)

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  5. The thank you is a great touch . I rode our bus system a couple of times last year and people did say thanks. I don't remember that when I rode the bus as a student.

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    1. Student Red! Did he have long hair and hippy beads?

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  6. Anonymous2:42 am

    I admit I rarely thank the bus driver - but that is because I usually exit the bus through the back door. Today the bus was packed and I sat near the front. Almost took the first open seat, but it's reserved for the handicapped and elderly, so I left it vacant. At the next stop someone my age or younger claimed it. Of course.

    Also, on my walk home someone honked their horn, which sounded like a train coming. I turned to see what the heck it was and some hillbilly shouted "Ha Ha!" out the window like he was pulling a prank.

    Manners? Courtesy? Decency? We could use some here in the US.

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    1. These things are important. They reveal the character of a country. President Obama's conduct was always exemplary. Can't say the same about the current incumbent.

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  7. If there's one good thing about the South (of the USA) it's that we generally have nice manners and are known for being polite. 😊

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    1. Thank you for this comment honeypie.

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  8. I rarely catch a bus these days, but when I do, it wouldn't occur to me to NOT say thank you to the driver.

    I usually travel at a time of day when the bus is not crowded, but on the ultra rare occasions when the bus IS crowded usually someone will see my walking stick and leap to their feet, reminding me that there are compensations in using the hated thing.

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    1. The walking stick would also prove to be a useful weapon if confronted by a mugger. Thanks for calling by again Rozzie. Hope you have a pleasant day (or night).

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  9. Nice of you to try and soft soap me YP but I'm not blameless on the ignorance front, I've had my moments. Having said that I still retain many of the old-fashioned habits such as holding a door open for a woman, or stepping aside to let her pass. My father-in-law, now in his 80's. is a born and bred Doncaster man and boy does he still retain his old habits of women are there to cook and clean the house and be generally subservient to a man.

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    1. I held a door open for a woman yesterday and she didn't say a thing so I piped up for her - "THANK YOU!" I guess she must have been from Down South.

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  10. Here in Germany, I very rarely use a bus. And when I do, the exit is far away from the driver so that you do not speak to him when you leave. But I do greet the driver when I board. With the trains that I use almost daily, you don't ever see or speak to the driver at all here.
    In Yorkshire, I am a frequent bus passenger, and I always, always greet the driver when boarding and say thank you when I leave.
    Being polite and friendly is so easy and brightens the day not just for the recipient, but also for the giver. It does not even cost money!

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    1. You make a good point. Manners are nice for donors as well as recipients. Thank you for calling by once again. Your thoughtful remarks are always much appreciated.

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  11. Thank you! For reminding us of such a simple/important courtesy.

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  12. It's very easy for many to make blanket statements without knowing the true facts....

    99.9% of the people whose paths have crossed with mine over these past 12 months have been well-mannered...and similar applies to previous years. The ignorant minor percentage are not worth wasting time thinking about or wasting energy on....

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    1. May I thank you, dear lady, for your well-considered comment? May I also wish you good health and happiness until our communication is resumed?

      Kind regards,
      Y.Pudding Esquire

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  13. Funny to see that picture, I was watching 'This is Your Life' on youtube last night, Reg Varney was the subject. What a nice man he was. I always say thank you to the driver.

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    1. Of course in Reg Varney's day buses had conductors as well as drivers. I would like to see conductors brought back. This would speed the buses up and provide useful employment.

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  14. OK, I'm going to be the rebel here. I often hear people in London thanking the driver when they get on or off the bus, and I often do it too, having read in Kate Fox's book "Watching the English" that it is a cultural imperative in the UK. But as an American I've long been perplexed about this. What is the driver being thanked for? For stopping? For driving? Isn't that just his job? I mean, I say thanks to cashiers in stores, and I guess that's just their job too, but I think many Americans would find thanking the bus driver a curious custom.

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  15. I'm not sure this has always been a Yorkshire custom. I used to take two buses each way to school in Leeds and have no memory of people routinely thanking the driver. In those days the corporation bus drivers were a gruff, officious lot, who had a high opinion of themselves (like many council staff at the time). Our next door neighbour used to drive the 77 and he reminded me of Geoffrey Boycott in his brusqueness. He hated what he called the "Twirlies" - the pensioners who used to flag down the bus at 8.55am with their post 9am free bus passes and say: "Am I too early?". When I emigrated to New Zealand in the 90s, one of the first cultural difference I noticed was that every passenger said "Thank you, driver" as they got off. This struck me as odd at the time, because why would you thank someone for just doing their job?

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Mr Pudding welcomes all genuine comments - even those with which he disagrees. However, puerile or abusive comments from anonymous contributors will continue to be given the short shrift they deserve. Any spam comments that get through Google/Blogger defences will also be quickly deleted.

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