Last evening the annual Yorkshire Pudding Blog Awards ceremony was held in exclusive Pudding Towers - a secluded designer mansion in the leafy suburbs of Sheffield. These highly prized awards represent the pinnacle of achievement in any blogger's career.Guests arrived to a Tetley's bitter reception and the music of Beyonce Knowles wafting live from the mansion's glittering south ballroom. Introductory nibbles included miniature snacks inspired by Spanish tapas but with a Yorkshire theme - fish and chips, bread and butter pudding, toad in the hole, Wensleydale curd tart and of course tiny Yorkshire puddings in rich beef and onion gravy.
Lord Pudding gave the opening address recalling several readable bloggers who appear to have fallen by the wayside this year - Arthur Clewley of "Arthur Clewley's Diary" who now dwells in a residential home on the outskirts of Richmond, North Yorkshire, Reidski who is currently working in a haggis factory in Ayrshire, "Retarded Rugrat" who is too busy enjoying her first year of married life in Vancouver to bother blogging any more and "Arctic Fox" from Huddersfield who now resides in Armley Gaol, Leeds for unspeakable crimes in public houses.
Lord Pudding spoke of the need to maintain high standards in blogging - "Blogging is a new art form with much wider possibilities than staccato tweets on Twitter or email banter between friends. Regular blog building creates both a window on the world and an ongoing opportunity to freely publicise the words you feel like writing on any number of subjects. You never know who might be directed to your blog or who might simply stumble upon it. Bloggers make friends - not quite like the friends we treasure in everyday offline life - but nonetheless people who come to matter to us because we have connected with them..."
The ceremony's main sponsor droned on in similar vein for half an hour or so. Some light snoring could be heard from the middle rows before the awards were presented. In summary:-
PHOTOGRAPHIC BLOGGER AWARD - Steve at "Occupied Country"
TOP GRANDAD BLOGGER - Sam at "The Golden Hill" (Hard luck Steve!)
PROMOTION OF STORYTELLING AWARD - Farida at "Saints and Spinners"
MOST HISTORICALLY AWARE BLOG - Hadriana at "Hadriana's Treasures"
TOP AMERICAN BLOGGER - Robert at "Rhymes With Plague"
TOP NEW ZEALAND BLOGGERS (Joint First) Katherine at "The Last Visible Dog" and David at "Arcane Enigma"
TOP WESTRAY ISLAND BLOGGER - Malc at "Edge of Nowhere" (Stiff competion for this award)
TOP COUNTRY LIFE BLOGGING AWARD - Debbie at "Ramblings" (Mopsa)
THE SUSAN BOYLE AWARD for THE TOP TRANSATLANTIC JET SET BLOGGER - Ian at "Retirement Rocks"
TOP WELSH BLOGGER and TOP DOG WALKING BLOGGER - Jenny at "Demob Happy Teacher"
MOST HELPFUL AUSTRALIA BASED BLOGGER AWARD - Michael at "In Sydney with an Old Leica"
TOP OLDHAM CLOGGER Steven at "Crofty's Blog"
TOP NORTHAMPTONSHIRE BLOGGER and TRAVELOG BLOGGER- "JJ" at "All Cobblers"
SOUTH EAST ASIA BLOGGER AWARD - Mr & Mrs Reginald Booth at "Bangkok Booths"
Last but not least the overall award for "Blogger of The Year 2009" went to Daphne from "My Dad's A Communist" (see photo right). The judging panel considered her blog to be "humane, humorous and honest using carefully crafted but accessible English". Wearing an emerald green sequinned evening gown from "Matalan", fishnet stockings and platinum stillettos, Daphne floated to the stage to collect her award, recalling her impoverished childhood in the mean back alleys of south Leeds. "I never thought I'd come this far," she stuttered.All award winners are entitled to copy and paste this exclusive 2009 widget into their own blogs at no financial cost to themselves! Any bloggers who feel cheated of richly deserved awards may send £50 to Pudding Towers and your award will be sent by return of post.
Thank you, Mr Pudding! I'm only sorry that you didn't publish my 2-hour acceptance speech in full (3 hours if you include the sobbing, obviously).
ReplyDeleteBut how dare you suggest that my gown came from Matalan - I got it in the pre-Christmas sale at Tesco's. Glad you noticed the fishnets - I wear them most days actually.
Seriously, many thanks, and much appreciated - I'm just always delighted when anyone reads my blog!
I am honored to be mentioned in the same breath as Daphne and all of my fellow co-recipients of your largesse. There's more at today's post on my own blog.
ReplyDeleteThank you, thank you very much, you've been a wonderful audience...I'll be here all week, try the veal.
ReplyDeleteWhat - an award for l'il ole me? Can I have one of thse things the chaps from Status Quo got? Happy New Year YP!
ReplyDeleteI'm quite overcome, YP. In fact I might even do a Kate Winslet. Just one small thing though - why wasn't I invited to accept the award personally???
ReplyDeleteDamn, I missed out again on the coveted "blogger of the year" award. I think it's fixed. You're ignoring me because you think I'm too frenchified and I've forgotten my Yorkshire roots. Perhaps you're right. But I will say I often dream of roast beef and Yorkshire pudding and Dandelion and Burdock and steak and kidney pudding and parkin and bubble and squeak and...
ReplyDelete... 2010 is another year.
Great, funny post to end the year on a high.
Bonne Année!
The Blogger of the year couldn't have gone to a more deserving blog (dashes away a disappointed tear).
ReplyDeleteAnd thank you for my own award M'Lord. I want to thank me Mum, me Dad (hello Dad!), the duck, and Susan Boyle.
I'm truly honoured to receive this award. It's the fulfilment of a lifelong ambition. I'd like to thank my agent, my masseur, my chiropractor and most of all you, my wonderful fans.
ReplyDelete*begins to peel onion*
Actually what's really worrying me is that Hull City are wearing a pinstripe Umbro kit identical to the one Wolves wore in 1985/86, the end of which season we were bankrupt (again) and relegated to the Fourth Division. Just a warning.
Happy New Year Mr P.
Glad you honored Rhymes with Plague.
ReplyDeleteOh my Gawd, Oh my Gawd ( I saw Halle Berry do this)... what can I say? I could feel the love and respect in the room, even though I was 12,000 miles away swatting flies away while trying not to spill my beer. I would just like to thank my DNA, which made this all possible, and of course, Mr Pudding (shurely now Lord Pudding in the New Years Honours?). Well, I'm getting the 45 second wind up, so I just want to thank you for reading my little blog. If you’ve enjoyed it then it's all been worthwhile. So until we meet again, goodnight, and I love you all!"
ReplyDeleteAh, the prestigious SEA award.
ReplyDeleteThe one I wanted...narrowly beating...
*takes his seat before kicking of Kanye West style*
I'm most humbled by this award of prestige and reknown, good sir. I'll endeavor to be worthy of it.
ReplyDeleteThank you lovely and gracious Mr Pudding.
ReplyDeleteBut I have to say that I would have given the travel writing award to your good self.
The Northamptonshire Blogger award was a tightly fought contest I am sure (erhh - is there another one?)
There, I was in the kitchens doing all the washing up and missed all these highlights of the Award Ceremony...Just call me Cinderella?
ReplyDeleteSo glad to be able to get the inside scoop from such a prestigious award.
ReplyDeleteYP - a serious question... Is Arthur Clewley really not blogging anymore? You refer to a 'residential home' - is this a retirement village, old persons' home or whatever euphemism you like...? I used to really love his posts.
ReplyDelete