26 March 2014

Takeover

Kim Jong-un Palace
Kim Jong-un Boulevard
 Kim Jong-unville (formerly Pyongyang)
KJU 1 
Pupils Republic of Korea

Howdy hi pupils lemme intloduce my self my name ist Kim Jong-un and Iyam the supleme leader of the democlatic Pupils Republic of Korea which ist velly nis cunt tree in Asia and Iyam taking over dis yorkshire pudding blog to spread my seed aloud the world cos dem US Merican pupils dun me no good leputation part from mister Denis Lodman who ham been my hero now not dat dickhed mister Michael Jordan who hast not cum in Pupils Republic of Korea to stay on my island and see all dem pitchers drawing of him when I boy in swizzerland School mister Denis Lodman he nis fellowbloke an he got many tattoo me make tattoo too on back of  wife Ri Sol-ju she me lumpy pumpy and makin baby boy who I call Kim Jong-Lodman after my friend of basketball in Merica nis blother for daughter Ju-ae why him bit black childlen of supleme leader who have dem new clear weapons and have led button to pless for dat Michael Jordan why he no cum make me velly angry hit on head with new clear weapon then him no laugh no laugh be aflaid like my uncle Jang Song Thaek when i have him killed body go twitchy me laugh ha-ha zapped that dude good no more tell me what to do no more stupid advice so howdy you do pupils make me nis comment maybe you come to Pupils Republic of Korea meet wife and kidz and have good tim on my island with me only thirdy one youngest leader in worl play basketball no famine here my pupils them loving me me better reader than my father him not so strong as me what supleme mean anybody know gotta go inspeck army later dem make nice strait line all loving me supleme leader send M&Ms
Yours fatefully 
King Jong-un xxxx

27 comments:

  1. Dear Kim Jong-un, son of Kim Jong-il, grandson of Menta Lee-il, it glate prezzure to making you kwain-tence via Yawk-sher Puddink Brog. Hoping to deverop rong flendship with you, o glate supleme reader. First duty of new flend is to point out for your considelation that pupils repubrik kolea is no isrand, it peninsura. In addition, thank you for kind invitation to visit, but I no pray basketbarr. However, other good flend Yawk-sher Puddink play clicket and sometimes lugby. Maybe he will cum in your cunt tree.

    OMG, N.T., this is HIRARIOUS!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lymeswivprague - you Merican you rike Lodman or Jordan? Supleme leader NO Kolea is penisurar Kim Jong-sun no slupid fella! My Ireand is off cloast in sojosun-man kolea sea. Have own rorrer croaster, have big fun, many kolean radies pray sausage have big palace rike King Cost mirrions and mirrions. No care. Me bossman. Sen me M&Ms preeze - no blue M&Ms - no likie. Mister Lymes - you know Avis Plessley? Sen him to my Ireand preeze. Sing "Crambake".

      Delete
  2. You never cease to amaze. I would never have guessed you were fluent in Hangul.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Adlian wha you say? Of cuss I no the Hangul halfabet! I am supleme leader of my cunt tree! Two day I make new law. All men mus hev same haircut as me. You mus go barber. Make same Miser Adlian or where twopay. You hev M&Ms?

      Delete
  3. Dearest reader, no got M&Ms. Got ICBMs. Arso, I no rike Lodman or Jordan. I rike Joe Montana. So solly to have to infahm you Mistah Avis Plessrey dead fo many yiz. His daughter, though, Reesa Malee, rook just rike him except wearing a dless. Maybe you rike closs dlessers? Big coincidence, I use to no, untir he arso died, one of the originar Jordanaires who sang behind Mistah Avis Plessrey on Ed Surrivan teevee sho - Mistah Hugh Jallet of Woodstock Jawja. Pletty shu no reration to Michaer Jordan - one shawt, fat and white and other tarr, skinny, and brack. You want I send you ICBMs?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ICBM velly good Miser Lymeswivprague. I give you meny dollops for !CBMs. Maybe twenty then I pow Seoul and Tokyo pow pow pow KERBOOOOM! Jus like computer game I am playing - "Nuclear Armageddon". Velly good. Avis Plessrey dead! No weigh Joe say! (Go PIgglywiggly buy Supleme Reader M&Ms preeze!) Send ICBMs FedEx. I pay.

      Delete
  4. Mr. Rymeswithplague, Mr. Adrian, and especially Mr. Pudding.......you guys have been drinking some powerful hooch!!! Stop it now before those policemen that Mr. Pudding has abused in the past come and take you away! (But thank you very much for the best half hour of my day! You guys are hilarious today!!!)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What hooch? Denis Lodman say like hooch. Maybe you give some to Supleme Leader AND M&Ms preeze! No liking blue ones.Send FedEx. I pay.

      Delete
  5. Hey! It's about time someone took over this blog. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ho ho - welsh Jenny. I am already hearing about you in Pupils lepublic of kolea. Montor blog system. Yo like hooch? Cum pray wid me welsh rabbit. Blinging M&Ms preeze! No blue. Red hokay.

      Delete
    2. so long as that 'someone' does not write poetry...

      Delete
    3. Pottery not arrowed in Kolea Pottamus! Pottery bore me in swizzerland school. I draw pitchers of Michael Jordan insted. Go Bulls! Hev M&Ms in Angrora? Sen me sum cock.

      Delete
  6. I rather suspect the takeover has been in the opposite direction. YP leads us to believe he spends half his time in Thailand. Really? I see the hand of YP all over recent legislation in the PRK that all school boys must have one hair style, oddly enough, the Yorkshire Pudding Bowl Haircut.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wha you say/ Wha you say Pottamus! You mus hev same haircut also. Make you hand sum rike Supleme Reader. Wanna be seclulity reader for me? I give you many dollops and jeep.

      Delete
    2. By no means the worst gig I have had and I could certainly use the dollops. I can hit a running dissident/traitor/international correspondent/student/striker/anyone-you-don't-like at 200 paces and because I always travel light I can use all the baggage allowance of the first class ticket you send me so I can travel to the PRK to carry non blue S&M's. I mean M&M's but I can do S&M as well if you pay me overtime (you should see me playing snakes and ladders). I have run the clippers around my head in the regulation manner and, you can ask anybody, I like drab uniform.

      Can the Jeep be Russian, please? This American one is doing my head in.

      Delete
  7. With the greatest of respect King Kong-un, I think you should lay off the M&Ms for a while. How can I put this politely? You are..ahem..becoming a bit of a chubber.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wha chubber Lolly? Wha chubber? Wha ahem? No make fun of Supleme Reader! Send me M&Ms or I get mad like rion!

      Delete
    2. Chubber means fat person Supleme Leader....and you can get yer own chuffin' M&Ms. Get mad like rion? More like ickle puddy cat. Now get off and play on your xbox, there's a good boy.

      Delete
    3. Yo France madame? No like frog. Sen PDR secret servers. Slam dunk yo in duck pond! Then no laugh Madame. Me laugh. No chubber - all mussel madame!

      Delete
    4. Whatever you say, Fatty Boy!

      Delete
  8. Looks like Kim Jong-un has been eating too many Yorkshire puddings with his M&Ms. Obviously Koreans are not used to rich Yorkshire diets so keep feeding them to him YP till he explodes ( shouldn't take long !).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You not nis rady! You Ozzie Sheira! Make me mad rike rion. Fockin Sidney will exprode no me! Sen big ICBM! POW! Slam dunk! Sidney go smitheleens! Ha ha ha! No raugh then Ozzie Sheira!

      Delete
  9. I can't determine if you guys are politically correct or not.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hearing of yoo in Pyongyang! Yoo chikken lady yes? Yoo Merican too. Yoo no Denis Lodman? Bigged frend of me. Goodfella. Go mall chikken lady preeze. Get me M&M! What "poritically correct"? No hev in Kolea.

      Delete
    2. Politically Correct, Sir, (if you will excuse my temerity), is the Happy State that exists when all Political Opposition has been Eliminated. Political Opposition is anyone The Supreme Leader does not like and, if I might be permitted to remind The Supreme Leader, something I can hit at 200 paces.

      Delete
    3. Bloody hell Hippo - you must have very long arms - like a living Stretch Armstrong!

      Delete
  10. Somehow (perhaps because I've just finished reading your previous post) I just can't see humour in the present situation. One of the problems is that Kim Jong-un may be a mentally unstable tyrant but he is reasonably well educated and either ruthless or completely ineffective and ruled by his 'advisers' who may be even more ruthless. Be afraid, be very afraid.

    ReplyDelete

Mr Pudding welcomes all genuine comments - even those with which he disagrees. However, puerile or abusive comments from anonymous contributors will continue to be given the short shrift they deserve. Any spam comments that get through Google/Blogger defences will also be quickly deleted.