31 December 2012

Celebration

Oh my aching head! Talk about the day after the night before. I haven't had so much to drink since the last Laughing Horse Awards ceremony. The final hour or two are a complete blur in my mind but various nightmarish images keep rising up from the cesspit of my memory. Mr Brague in nothing but a studded leather thong sliding down the hotel bannisters. Jenny and Libby standing on the bar to do a drunken medley of Cheeky Girls songs. Captain Gowans arm wrestling in the lobby with feisty Jan from California and losing! And Helen from "Helsie's Happenings" chasing me round the hotel fountain with my trousers in her hands yelling, "Come to mama ya pommy bastard!"

An ambulance was called to take Ian from "The Owl Wood" and Senor Brian el Cuttso to hospital because of their over-indulgent drinking. A grinning and sober Ian from "Shooting Parrots" played his ukelele on the staircase - old George Formby numbers which were much appreciated by starry-eyed Daphne, Elizabeth and Earl Gray who sat in awe on the carpeted steps beneath him. Steve - once of  "Occupied Country" and Arctic Fox - out briefly on parole from HMP Armley - fought in the car park with Olaf the Swedish barman and a couple of  Saudi Arabian bloggers before the outraged French hotel manager intervened.
Steve Bruce last night  - upset by acerbic comments from Cap'n Gowans
Oh my Lord - what a night! Anyway, let's backtrack to earlier in the evening when the awards were announced  - soon after the opening address was given by Hull City's manager Steve Bruce. It was all tuxedos, shimmery evening dresses and polite chortling at that point. And these were the winners...
African blogger of the year - Tom Gowans of "Hippo on the Lawn"
Welsh male blogger of the year - Earl John Gray - creative brains behind "Going Gently"
Paste me in
Wrexham blogger of the year and Welsh female blogger of the year - Jennyta from "Demob Happy Teacher"
Australia's best blogger award (Sponsored by Vegemite) - Helen from "Helsie's Happenings"
Best blogger in Aby Lincolnshire - Ian from "The Owl Wood"
Sexiest lady blogger - Libby from "D-Scribes"
Sexiest male blogger and best research blogger - Ian from "Shooting Parrots"
Top Animal Care Blogger and yet again top blogger in Sloughhouse, California - Jan from "Cosumne Gal"
Top Yorkshire blogger (female) - Elizabeth "Well this Int Gettin Ens Fed"
Top Yorkshire blogger (male), Nobel Peace Prize and United Nations Humanitarian Award - Yorkshire Pudding
Best communist theatrical agent blogger from north Leeds - Daphne "My Dad's a Communist"
Catalonia's Premier English Blogger - Brian Cutts of "Tannu Tuva"
Hamilton NZ's best blogger and Top Granddad Blogger - David from "Cimba7200"
Top Senior Blogger and once again Top American Blogger - Robert Brague "Rhymes With Plague"

Winners are entitled to copy and paste this year's designer widget into their own blogs or sidebars:-

But...drum roll. The Laughing Horse Blogger of the Year for 2012 is.....(pause for heartbeat drumming)...is none other than New Zealand-based blogger Katherine de Chevalle, creator of "The Last Visible Dog"! Hurrah! In their citation, the Awards Committee said, "Katherine's blog provides a healthy mixture of  personal topics, reflections on national and international news items and there is much exploration of wildlife issues, sometimes pausing to celebrate the creatures and the plants she sees around her. Her passion for Art recurs in the blog but her own creativity is never flaunted egotistically. The comments she leaves on other people's blogs are generally warm and encouraging with only occasional glints of her wicked sense of humour. She also makes exceedingly good muffins."  The committee chose to waive objections made by several  Brush-Tailed Possum Support Groups.

In fact, as Katherine weaved her way to the stage past cheering guests to receive her cheque from Steve Bruce, it was obvious that her fur coat was not mink after all but pure NZ brush tailed possum - approximately thirty pelts were used in its manufacture by an Otorohanga fashion house.
A stunned Katherine as the award was announced.
What a wonderful way to say goodbye to an old year and to welcome in a new one. 
Happy 2013 Everybody! Happy New Year!

19 comments:

  1. I'm all overcome. Thank you. Squooze me, off to get the tissues to wipe the laughter-tears.

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    1. Oh please she thinks she's Sally field

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  2. If I were to stand on a bar singing, it would be Abba songs, YP, but thank you very much for the esteemed award. Does it come with a financial award too? Happy New Year to you and your family. :-)

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  3. KATHERINE Please accept my personal congratulations. Do you think this news will make the NZ Herald's front page?
    JENNY Sorry no financial award but you will soon be invited to visit Wrexham's Racecourse Ground, as the guest of honour, to watch a Blue Square Premiership match. You will be provided with a free Wrexham kit which you must wear on the day.

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  4. ... I'll catch you one day you delectable example of Yorkshire , you gorgeous puddin'!

    PS Thanks for the award

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  5. Probably YP. Any paper that could have this (below) will print anything. But you HAVE given me an idea...

    http://wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net/80450F/planet1051.com/files/2012/09/newspaper.jpg

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  6. Happy New Year to all - and CONGRATULATIONS to Katherine!

    As regards my own award, well, I'd like to thank my mother, the milkman, (and in later years my mother; the milkman), Ug of cave number three for inventing the pointy stick and Ken Dodd for getting shot in '63 and thus sparking off the dawning of the Age of Aquarius.

    I like world peace, helping old ladies across the road and secretly doing glute exercises while I'm in court.

    Mwuh! Mwuh!

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  7. Oh what to say? thank you so much for the award YP....I think now I might reconsider the boob job/nose job/liposuction/eye lift/buttock lift .....maybe just a new dressing gown and a brush through the hair will suffice today eh? thanks again and well done to all the other very deserving winners.

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  8. Oh dear, I really can't take myself anywhere, can I?

    Congratulations to Katherine, apologies to Mr Bruce and a happy new year to everyone!

    By thw way, if anyone at the party woke up this morning with two right shoes, I woke up with two left ones so get in touch. I also discovered I was wearing stockings and suspenders but I think I'll keep them...

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  9. Thoughts on New Year's Day:

    1. We simply have to stop meeting like this.

    2. So many bannisters, so little time.

    3. Those weren't studs, those were genital warts.

    4. The thong is ended, but the malady lingers on.

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  10. HELEN I'm frightened.
    KATHERINE Hopefully the "idea" is not a painting of a man with an eel in his bum!
    THE OWL WOOD There was stiff competition from Aby's blogging community. You did well to make the grade!
    LIBBY Please send me candid pictures so that I can assess your body modification needs.
    HIPPO MAURICE Oh those stockings and suspenders! Don't you remember? Oh dear, oh dear... What a naughty fellow you are!
    RHYMES WITH THONG This has got to be one of the funniest lines you have ever produced - "The thong is ended, but the malady lingers on." Very good!

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  11. My arm is sore this morning, Captain Gowans put up a good fight, but we country girls are pretty tough. If Jennyta stood on a bar singing Abba songs, I would have been there with her. I can sing Benny's parts.

    Katherine, heartfelt congratulations! I loved the Angelina Jolie-like pose you did on the red carpet, with one chubby (according to YP) knee showing. I'm sure that picture will be all over the internet.

    And mostly, thanks to all the little "people" who surround me every day. Pardon me while I leave now to take one to the veterinarian.

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  12. Jan, that wasn't my arm you were wrestling...

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  13. HIPPO Be warned! Jan is a cultured country lady of noble birth who doesn't take kindly to vulgarity. Even though you were in the army and "security" she'd whup your ass dude! Be afraid, be very afraid!

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  14. Christ. And I bet she knows how to shoot straight. Do me a favour Sir Pud and delete all my comments. In the meantime I am off to hide in a monastery.

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  15. Smiles THINLY and claps weakly
    I should have won
    Bollocks

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  16. Hey YP, this came as a surprise to read in your blog that I have won an award as "Hamilton NZ's best blogger and Top Granddad Blogger - David from "Cimba7200". Please tell me when and how that came about as I wasn't aware of it until now. Very nice though - thanks. I hope your OE is going well - Dave

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  17. Sorry YP. I haven't read blogs for a few days and haven't kept up. I have been back on your earlier blogs now and now understand how the awards happened. Thanks again. I will receive your award gratefully - Dave

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  18. Days if not weeks later, I'm sobering up to the reality of actually having won something. Wow!! Thanks, and thanks to all of you for a great night (I think).
    And Bon Voyage and Happy New Year etc!!

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