What is life, 'tis all a vapour
Tho' long on earth we both did stay
Our time was wasted like a taper
Fleeting soon it died away.
Two hundred years ago, Thomas Harris and his wife Elizabeth were buried in Old Somerby churchyard. They both died in the 1820s having reached great ages for their time. Thomas was 82 and Elizabeth was 79. I am sure that their skilfully carved slate gravestone once stood upright but nowadays it lies horizontal in the grass. Possibly a modern health and safety matter.
But what really caught my eye about their gravestone was the epitaph at the bottom. It seems devoid of religious content or any ambition to achieve an after-life state of being. It could have almost been written by the existentialist playwright - Samuel Beckett. A world without a benign "God" watching over them like a shepherd and maybe a pointless world too.
The four lines do not make great poetry. They seem rather amateurish to me but the meaning is clear. You can sense the despair and it's rather sad that anyone should reach old age and feel so unfulfilled - as if it had all been like a cheap candle burning down.
On a lighter note, it put me in mind of what kind of epitaph I will have on the base of my memorial statue in Endcliffe Park and I have come up with this...
The great Yorkshire Pudding is resting here
He wasted his life on blogging and beer
He could have been someone but chose not to be
And stayed home instead with a nice cup of tea.
Yep, so that's my epitaph. It saves my family a job in what will certainly be a grief-stricken period for them. Why not take a leaf out of my book and write your epitaph too? You can share it in the comments below. Alternatively, if you need help, I can knock one up carefully craft one for you for a mere fifty guineas! Money up front please.
A cheap tallow candle burning down.
ReplyDeleteThe annals of the poor. Well said, Neil.
Farewell to the fellow they called Old Jack
DeleteHe's gone away and won't come back
But now he resides in a much better place
With angel wings and a smile on his face.
Jeepers ! I felt a goose walk over my grave.
DeleteOr as Tolstoy used to say to men like Donald Trump :
* The grass will grow over your grave and that'll be that. *
Trump will be covered with plastic grass beneath The Great Golden Arch of Crassness.
DeleteI couldn't think of one so I stole this:
ReplyDeleteHere lies an atheist.
All dressed up and nowhere to go.
Here lie the remains of a man called Bob
DeleteWho left hot fat in a pan on his hob
Fire engines came but it was too late
As those flames shot higher he met his fate.
Whatever got her, it wasn't boredom.
ReplyDeleteShe has had the last waltz.
DeleteSorry - I am sure you have often been teased like that!
I'll just steal Spike Milligan's, 'I told you I was ill'.
ReplyDeleteI can't think of anything to rhyme with Andrew. But Andy presents more possibilities... such as "randy" for example.
DeleteIn every stormy wind that blew
DeleteHis manly courage grew and grew
He kept his compass straight and true
There never was a mate like our Andrew ...
Fair dinkum, bonzer bloke, Rest In Peace.
Gone to what some aboriginals called The Spirit Realm. Now he''ll camp forever by the billabong of eternity. Poor Andrew.
DeleteThe Dreamtime !
DeleteTHE TRACK TO BRALGU (Picador 1980) by B. Wongar.
12 stories. 90 pages. Indigenous Australians on their ancestral lands.
Invasive uranium mining despoiling their sacred environment.
This little book won glowing reviews from Thomas Keneally & others.
*Harsh. Bitter. Magical.* Alan Paton author of Cry the Beloved Country.
I wondered if this was on your mind when you commented on Andrew's sadness post.
ReplyDeleteShades of "out out brief candle" (Year 10).
"The pudding homeward plods his weary way." (Haggerty beat me to that.)
But hey! You could have been a contender!
Hey, I could have bin the champion of the world!
DeleteWrite my own epitaph? Not much point since I don't plan on being buried, there will be no grave that needs visiting or tending. My body will go to the teaching hospital for dissecting and study, OR, to the forensics place in the next state over where it will lay in the woods for nature to take care of while scientists take notes on how long it takes, and what animals or insects feast upon it etc.
ReplyDeleteYou are bigging yourself up again Elsie! What makes you think that animals and insects will want to eat you?
DeleteHer walks have now come to an end.
ReplyDeleteLet's hope she's found what's round the bend.
Her walks have now come to an end.
DeleteLet's hope she's found what's round the bend
The Lord awaits her with open arms
Soon to succumb to her Swabian charms.
She trod the Black Forest shod in Nike
DeleteHer secrets were hidden in her Psyche
Eine Freundliche Dame and never Spiky
Who liked her food a little Spicey.
We'll miss her always. Our dear blogger Meike.
She was a kind-hearted soul but we must look to the future now.
DeleteHagg's attempt at clerihew the Lady don't like-y.
DeleteThe friendship's over. O Crikey ! O Meike !
Goodness! I am still here, you know!
Delete(And besides, my hiking boots are not Nike, and my regular walking shoes are New Balance. But I agree that I'm rarely spiky and do like spicey food.)
My life was short, as a candle flickers
ReplyDeleteNow here I lie, without any ...
Sorry. Can't think of anything that rhymes ...
Now here I lie, without any "Snickers"
DeleteOther chocolate bars are available.
Who knows what my family will find fit to say about me, if anything at all.
ReplyDeleteI can assure you there will be no secret recipe put on my grave in my memory.
Kylie Sonja loved a chat and a bit of a wander,
Dogs and singing made her happy.
Jokes and joy and people mattered.
50 guineas please!
DeleteKylie lived the life of Riley
But like that coyote she was always wily
Her demeanour was generally smiley
She'll be remembered very highly
Hey! If anyone is living the life of Riley here, it's me!
DeleteI'd like one please! But I don't know the conversion rate for guineas...
ReplyDelete75 bucks will do...
DeleteHere lie the bones of Jennifer Barlow
Whose ancestors came from a place called Harlow
She lived a good life with Lord Marco and Gregg
And maintained this secret - she had only one leg!
If I planned to be buried with a tombstone (I do not) I would want it to say, "She was a good cook. Also, she could dance really well."
ReplyDeleteHe flew like a penguin
ReplyDeleteVisited places near and far
He landed a long way from where he started,
Onward! Always onward!
I found the epitath quite sad really.
ReplyDeleteHere is my poor attempt.
Here lies a faithful Lancastrian.
Who's beliefs were Humanitarian.
She loved all the flowers
But not "Superpowers"
And here she lies feeding the earth.