19 June 2023

Gaslighting

On several occasions I have come across the term "gaslighting" but have always struggled to know what it means and whether or not I should add it to my own vocabulary. I have been doing a little research.

The term is connected with a 1944 film called "Gaslight" starring Charles Boyer as Gregory Anton and Ingrid Bergman as his his wife -  Paula Alquist Anton.  Gregory secretly  searches in the attic of their inherited London home for precious jewellery and  when he puts the gaslight on up there, the lights in the rest of the house go noticeably dimmer.

When Paula mentions this Gregory dismisses her claims as nonsensical and this becomes the core of his campaign to make her think she is going crazy.

The term "gaslighting" is not in fact used in the film but it has come to be associated with psychological manipulation - undermining somebody's self-confidence and cause them to question their sense of reality.

You know when you look for a word in Google, the search engine starts to churn out related questions. I guess this is meant to be helpful though some of the questions that appear may be quite dubious. However, this came up:-

What is an example for gaslighting?
Gaslighting happens when an abuser tries to control a victim by twisting their sense of reality. An example of gaslighting would be a partner doing something abusive and then denying it happened.

"Gaslighting" was the "word of the year" for 2022 over at Merriam-Webster - the dictionary people. They defined it as "behaviour that's mind manipulating, grossly misleading, downright deceitful."

The use of "gaslighting" in conversation and print has rocketed since 202o. Back in the late nineteenth century it was only ever used to describe lighting that was literally derived from gas but modern usage is all about manipulation and control.

Although I don't like writing his name in this blog, Donald Trump has shown that regarding gaslighting there are few who can compare with him. It comes naturally - bending the truth and making people doubt themselves. He has done it a hell of a lot since he arrived on the political scene. His failing communications website - reputedly an alternative to "Twitter" - is called "Truth Social" but the notion of truth seems to run counter to the very record of Trump's life.

With regard to  ease of use, "gaslighting" does not sit well with me.  I think I would feel more comfortable using terms like "psychological control", "mental abuse" and "manipulation".  I don't find "gaslighting"  especially helpful but it is always good to try to keep up with this constantly evolving English language.

29 comments:

  1. He is an abomination who couldn't tell the truth, even if vould save his life.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He loves the power trip - always seeking to be top dog - belittling and abusing others.

      Delete
  2. I think gaslighting is a very specific type of abuse and i would use the word if it fitted the situation but in my observation, general manipulation is a lot more common

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I would not feel confident using "gaslighting".

      Delete
  3. I agree that the terms used should reflect the evil that gaslighting really is. Here, a single punch to the head often used by young men used to be called a king hit (probably is in many parts of the world). After a spate of death and serious injury caused by this form of attack it is now know as a coward's punch. As it should.

    ReplyDelete
  4. To me, gaslighting is a term that glosses over some more negative ideas.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think you are right... as per usual.

      Delete
  5. "Gaslighting" has become the new buzz word for the world.
    Thing 45 doesn't gaslight, he lies and cheats and steals and terrorizes.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I'm aware of the word, its meaning and origins because I looked it up some time ago. I've yet to hear it used in person by anyone I know, and if some people are unsure of its meaning, it is probably a word that should not be used. I like 'mental manipulation'. It is easy for anyone to understand.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I bet many intelligent people who have come across the word do not fully get it.

      Delete
  7. I knew both the term and its origin, as I had watched the 1944 film a few times when it was on TV during my teenage years in the 1980s. My sister and I were quite impressed by it, which is probably why I remembered the meaning of gaslighting when I first came across it.
    What puzzles me, though, is how it came to be Word of the Year as early as 1922 when the film was done only in 1944.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That was my deliberate mistake! Well spotted! Now corrected.

      Delete
  8. I've known the meaning of gaslighting but have never been gaslighted myself. i hear things and think "who's he/she trying to kid? I have more sense than to believe that". It does mean I don't trust a lot of people though.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I will always remember a piece of advice that my very gregarious brother Paul gave me - "Never trust anybody!"

      Delete
  9. Word of the year 1922? Stop trying to gaslight us. You know full well it was 2032.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Like Meike you spotted my deliberate mistake Big Chief Eagle Eye! Now corrected.

      Delete
    2. Tasker, 2032 whch hasn't happened yet? Do you perchance mean 2022?

      Delete
  10. Like you, I struggled to understand what gaslighting meant, but your reference to the film has explained it better. I would also prefer to use a term that was more understandable like 'psychological abuse'
    .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Most developments in language add to understanding and our ability to explain things better but I am not sure about "gaslighting". Maybe it's just for cleverdicks.

      Delete
  11. I had no idea what the word meant so I'm happy to be more informed. However I'm not sure that using what is in effect a hiding the ugly reality. I'd rather use the words you have suggested although I notice that Kylie says the gaslighting is a very specific form. However without more analysis of all that's been said I'm not sure that I understand which specific form. I like plain English that I can understand without dubiety - wherever possible.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thinking about plain English, I do not think that I have ever used the word "dubiety" before. Far more useful than "gaslighting"!

      Delete
  12. I too have wondered what it meant. I don't think it's a word that I would use!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think I will only use it in relation to old caravans and cottages where they rely on gaslighting at night-time.

      Delete
  13. He (who you only reluctantly named) would know the truth if it bit him on his ample bum.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Thank you for this post. I'm not always up to date with terms like this. Now I know.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Thanks for explaining it, Neil. I always forget what it is supposed to mean and I think the plain, more graphic words you suggested make it more clear. Plain English as you and Graham say.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I was accused of "gaslighting" a fellow blogger several months ago, because I disagreed with them and said so. Apparently merely posing questions, no matter how friendly or supported by science, can "undermin(e) somebody's self-confidence and cause them to question their sense of reality." At least according to this particular person. (Who was not you, I hasten to add for the benefit of any comment readers here.)

    ReplyDelete

Mr Pudding welcomes all genuine comments - even those with which he disagrees. However, puerile or abusive comments from anonymous contributors will continue to be given the short shrift they deserve. Any spam comments that get through Google/Blogger defences will also be quickly deleted.

Most Visits