Just in case you were wondering, Jesus was a blonde. This fact was confirmed when I visited Christ Church yesterday - in the affluent Sheffield suburb of Dore. There was Jesus in a stained glass window looking very holy and as blonde as many Scandinavians. It made me wonder - did Jesus come from Denmark?
To tell you the truth, I do not think about Jesus very often and I have certainly never asked him to come into my life or anything like that. To me, he's just a heroic character in a story that may or may not have had its seed in long ago happenings during the Roman occupation of Palestine. That tale was later embellished by storytellers, medieval monks and others with vested interests in perpetuating the Jesus legend - including The Romans.
In Egypt, a civilisation flourished for two thousand years before Jesus was allegedly born in Bethlehem. How did they cope without his presence? The same over in China - five thousand years of civilisation before so-called missionaries arrived with the tale of Jesus. And then there were the Aztecs, the Incas, the Khmers, ancient cultures on the Indian subcontinent. All of them seem to have evolved and thrived without the Christian God and his only begotten son. How did they do that?
I looked up to The Blonde Jesus in Dore church and asked for explanation and enlightenment but Blonde Jesus never answered me. If the truth be known, he never does respond. It's all just imagining and wishful thinking.
I am sorry if this blogpost has offended any Christian believers and practitioners who visit this humble Yorkshire blog. I know that there are a few of you out there. Were you aware that Jesus was a blonde and not a swarthy, dark-haired middle-easterner?
Have you ever read "Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal" by Christopher Moore? I think you might like it.
ReplyDeleteThanks Pixie. I will keep it in mind.
DeleteLike you, YP, I am atheist and have always been such. It pleases me that my parents did not christen me. I don’t understand why people believe or pray but if that works for them why not. It does, however, annoy me when people say that we are all spiritual even if we don’t recognize it. Rubbish I say. Similarly I would never say that people who say they believe are lying.
ReplyDeleteLove the buildings and spend a lot of my time trying to protect my local church.
Do you stand outside it every night with an Alsatian and a shotgun?
DeleteBlonde? . . . . or simply a Bottle Blonde?
ReplyDeleteMaybe we should quiz his hairdresser if she is still around.
DeleteWow, Jesus looks like a Viking here. Haha.
ReplyDeleteDon't be daft Jennifer! If he was a Viking he'd be wearing a helmet with horns.
Delete