29 March 2016

Prisoner

Clint
How would you like to be imprisoned in a refrigerator for years? No? Well this is what has happened to a dear little chocolate bunny called Clint. The poor little fellow's warden is The Laughing Horse Blogger of the Year (2015), none other than Mistress Lee located on Tamborine Mountain in southern Queensland, Australia.

Each night poor little Clint shivers and cries himself to sleep while Mistress Lee gorges herself on bakery products, chuckling at the latest episodes of "Home and Away" or re-runs of "Skippy the Bush Kangaroo". What drove her to imprison Clint is anybody's guess but the motivation is probably deeply psychological going right back to her childhood in Gympie.

I have already been in contact with the office of The Governor of Queensland, urging him to send a task force to Tamborine Mountain to free sweet little Clint but have so far had no reply. Perhaps Paul de Jersey has more important matters in his in-tray but in my view of things, the enforced captivity of a small chocolate creature is an affront to civilised people everywhere.

May I urge bloggers across the world to pressurise relevant authorities in order to achieve Clint's release? Do what you can. But in the meantime please chant with me...
SET CLINT FREE!
SET CLINT FREE! 

41 comments:

  1. I think Mr Pudding has been smoking those funny cigarettes again!

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    1. Yes and thanks for the package you sent by Air Mail Jennifer. It got here safely. Does Gregg grow it himself?

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  2. It does seem like it, doesn't it.
    Mind you, what woman in her right mind keeps chocolate, bunny-shaped, or otherwise, in her fridge for years... I sympathise with the poor little fellow, I really do, but really, he's had a very lucky escape. If he was dark chocolate, and more than 80% cocoa solids, he wouldn't even have made it to the fridge in our house.
    I'm off to make a couple of placards with Set Clint Free, and then I'll do my bit.

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    1. Placards! That's a great idea CG. We shall hold a rally in Trafalgar Square before marching to Australia House. SET CLINT FREE! badges will be available to all.

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    2. Coppa's girl...I am of right mind, do you mind??

      When there are supermarket shelves loaded with chocolate bunnies why on earth would I want to eat Clint?? I also have loads more dark chocolate in my fridge for my pleasure. It is Clint's job to guard it.

      Clint and I are great mates. I know he wouldn't eat me...and vice versa! :)

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    3. Oops, sorry, but well - it isn't the sort of thing that normally happens in most households - is it? I know of places where the chocolate never actually makes it home from the supermarket ! Good for Clint, if he's doing a good job guarding the rest of your chocs.

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  3. I have a Clint on the window sill in the kitchen. He has sat there for the last week and I really dislike him because he is flaunting himself into tempting me to eat him and he knows I am trying to lose weight. So don't expect me to back any campaign to set Clint Free.

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    1. Setting Clint free is not synonymous with eating him Mrs Weaver! To lose a bit of weight may I suggest that you take up fell running? You will need a day-glo lycra tracksuit and a red, white and blue headband.

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    2. Thank you, The Weaver of Grass...one who understands...another who has a good heart. There are few of us left...we must stick together! :)

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  4. I've been worried about YP lately. (With apologies to Mrs Dale).

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    1. Your worry is like a healing balm to my troubled soul Graham.

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  5. I don't know which we ought to do. Have the authorities free Clint or have a different set of authorities and medical personnel examine Lee to see if she is in her right mind. I think not if she left poor Clint uneaten for more than a week.

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    1. Poor little bunny! (I am referring to Clint and not Lee)

      Oh and what is happening to your blog Mama Bear? I tried to go to it earlier on and found the entrance blocked. Have the CIA finally caught up with you in your mountain hideaway?

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    2. I have blocked my blog, Mr. Pudding, and I have stopped writing for the time being and maybe longer. I did write a long piece about why and kept it on my blog for a few days before closing the blog. I will continue to interact with all the wonderful friends I have made over the past couple of years but I feel that I have nothing more to add that is new and/or interesting. My life and days are spent in a mundane way to most but me. I do care about all of you and hope you will allow me this freedom and still allow me into your lives.

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    3. I award you "Freedom of the Blogosphere". Your certificate is in the post. I hope than in a few weeks or months you will reconsider your decision, unblock your blog and write about more things...

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  6. Having read your post, Yorkie...Clint has barricaded himself securely in my fridge! I can't even open it now!!

    He told me he wouldn't allow me access to the fridge until you retract your threat! (He whispered he would allow me access, but only when no one is looking)! He waves a wicked chocolate ear so beware!

    He's not prepared to give up his home for anyone! Not you; not Paul de Jersey, not even Queen Liz on celebration of her 90th! Clint said for me to tell you to tell Liz to get her own bunny! And like Liz, Clint won't abdicate for anyone!

    Clint also told me to tell you and the rest of the world now that you've broken the news...that he is very content where he resides; where he has lived for the past 8 years or whatever.

    Clint wears the mantle of Guardian of the Contents of Lee's Fridge with pride. Clint is very proud of the position he holds and will not allow anyone to take that away from him. He knows I won't!

    So...you know what to do next, Yorkie!!!

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    1. Oh, Lee - you make us all feel so guilty. I'm so glad that I don't have a Clint to tempt me - he doesn't know how lucky he is ! I just hope you don't have any visitors who go sneaking in your fridge, when you're not looking - and come across Clint, just doing his duty.....

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  7. That so many of you have come together against Clint and me is hurtful...disheartening, to say the least! We are both saddened that you have turned against us in this manner!

    I think I might join Clint in the the fridge and hide away from the world....*sob*!

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    1. You will have to remove the fridge shelves first then you will need to sit in the fridge - curled up in the foetal position. Before clambering in may I suggest that you cover your body in kitchen foil so that you get the full Clint experience..."chortle!"

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    2. Joining Clint in the fridge is not such a bad idea in this awful heat Lee. When will it end ?
      My MIL had two of Clint's relatives sitting on a shelf in her room at the nursing home. They've been there for two years now, she thinks they are pretty ornaments. What is the shelf life of chocolate I wonder ? ???

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    3. Hey there Helsie...I'm sick of the heat, too. It's going on too long - bring on the cooler weather, I say!

      Clint sends his love your MIL's two mates.

      From what I've gleaned Clint, similar to me, is well passed his use-by date! lol

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  8. Now I'm a skeptic. Does this mean set Clint free so I can eat him!

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    1. No, Red! You see...Clint is the most free of all chocolate bunnies...he will never be eaten! That has to be freedom, don't you agree?

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    2. Freedom? Incarceration!

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  9. Here is an idea that gives you hours of fun without spending any money on top of what Clint (or any of his relatives) have already cost:
    Unwrap him carefully and flatten the wrapper. Now look at the flat face on the wrapper... and laugh!
    (I am serious - this has once had me in stitches at the office. I must have been in a rather silly mood to begin with, but it really was very, very funny in a very weird way.)
    Of course some of you may be too sensitive to look at an undressed choccolate bunny for long, so maybe you want to eat it first and then smoothe the wrapping foil.

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    1. Giggling about a piece of flattened chocolate bunny foil should be an arrestable offence. Sitting for years in Lee's fridge, the only thing that has kept Clint alive is the insulation provided by his golden foil suit.

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  10. They have to be very careful not to impact on the indiginous wildlife down under. It is all very well setting Clint free, but if everyone did that then the place would soon be overrun by chocolate rabbits.

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    1. Good point oh wise one! But a chocolate rabbit fence could be constructed to encircle Tamborine Mountain - linked of course with "Gripple" tensioning devices made in Sheffield.

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  11. Tsk! Tsk! The lot of you, bar a couple, are just plain jealous...and hard-hearted!

    Most of you heartlessly plough on forth without a care in the world for my feelings or those of Clint! Our emotions are all over the place. You think both Clint and I have cold hearts...but this is not so!

    He and I are now comforting each other as we work our way through the Cherry Ripes and blocks of almond-laden dark chocolate; and when we finish those, we'll move onto the dark chocolate-coated ginger.

    Clint and I now know who our real friends are! You've displayed your true colours...and they're definitely not golden!

    Rabbit-proof fence! Poof! One is not needed here around my fridge! Remy and Shama work shifts guarding it! They're beefeaters, you know!!

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    1. Feeding a rabbit "Cherry Ripes" is itself alarming. A rabbit diet should consist of green vegetation and the occasional carrot. May I also take you to task about your use of the offensive term "Poof!". Mr Parrots is not a "poof", he is a hot-blooded lady lover with countless notches on his Moroccan leather belt.

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    2. Hahahahaha! You're stirrer, Yorkie!!!

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    3. Well, I reckon Clint might enjoy Lee's diet better than the green vegetation and occasional carrot, YP. Where's the fun in that? Almost as bad as having an uneaten chocolate bunny in the fridge (giggle, giggle!)

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  12. Oh no - this is terrible ! I've just come back from our local supermarket and they have dozens of bunnies, just like Clint - all lined up in cardboard cages and (gasp, sob) people are buying them and say they are going to EAT them! Oh Lee, I'm sorry I was so rude - I really feel your pain, now that I've seen all these poor little bunnies just waiting there... What will become of them? Will they just wait in vain, wait until they are very old, or will they be marked down in the hope of a quick sale? Oh dear.

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    1. Were the Clints in your local supermarket reduced CG? I unlocked several cardboard cages in "Tesco" and there were Clints hopping all over the place. The spotty fellow who fills the milk section accidentally stood on one Clint and crushed the poor creature to death so I walloped him with a turnip.

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    2. No, I don't think they were reduced - not yet anyway. I think it's still too near Easter. Oh dear (wrings hands) I didn't dare open any of the cages, just in case they escaped. They could have met a similar fate, except that we don't have spotty fellows in the milk section...in fact I don't think we even have a milk section ! I'm glad you stood up for poor little flattened Clint though - Lee will be proud of you !

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  13. I am reminded of that immortal line in victoria wood's DINNERLADIES
    " have younseen my clint? "

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    1. It is a question that Lee has often asked.

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  14. You do realise what you all have done, don't you?

    Clint's ego has been boosted a thousand-fold. I feared his head will swell, but I have had a quiet chat to him and told him not to let his instant fame change him - for him to remain the way he is.

    Clint can't believe he's become such a famous bunny...from doing nothing outstanding to create such a fuss.

    He's started his own Instagram account and now has more followers than the Kardashians combined. Now they're trying to keep up with Clint!!!!

    With all the furore and concern over Clint's welfare and my mental stability I've overlooked asking you, Yorkie....how is your hip? I hope it's no longer giving you grief and that soon you fit enough to start hopping along again without a care in the world.

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    1. Thanks for asking Lee. Three sweeks after the fall, it is still not right and I am nervous about really long walks. As for Clint, perhaps he should take over from Paul de Jersey as Queensland's governor. Clint de Rabbit for Governor!

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    2. Just take short walks at a time...don't overdo things. I speak from experience my right hip gives me grief, and my left sometimes decides to go out in sympathy! The joys of growing older...our joints like to remind us daily. I wish they'd mind their own business! Take care.

      I've taken note of your suggestion and have penned a letter and sent it off to Paul de Jersey, suggesting it might be time for him to get a new guernsey!

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    3. Thank you for your advice Matron. If only I hadn't slipped and fallen that day! Lee de Tamborine would be an excellent spokeswoman for the Queensland Prison Service.

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Mr Pudding welcomes all genuine comments - even those with which he disagrees. However, puerile or abusive comments from anonymous contributors will continue to be given the short shrift they deserve. Any spam comments that get through Google/Blogger defences will also be quickly deleted.

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