Horrorscopes

Capricorn: December 22 – January 19

Keep a close eye on your savings as scammers are on to you and you may find your funds draining away like waste water. Consider changing all your passwords.
Aquarius: January 20 – February 18

Oh dear! Your health is under threat and your story could easily reach a premature end. When is the last time you had your heart checked out? After all, you are not as young as you used to be.
Pisces: February 19 – March 20

Nobody likes you any more and you find that none of your old friends want to make social arrangements  with you. Perhaps you should have been nicer or paid better attention to your personal hygiene.

Aries: March 21 – April 19

Time to get the electric wiring in your home  investigated if you are to avoid an unwelcome blaze. Do you have functioning fire extinguishers in every room in the property?

Taurus: April 20 – May 20

Two police officers come a -knocking on your door and they don't look too happy. What did you do that was so bad? The handcuffs will feel especially tight.
Gemini: May 21 – June 21

Food poisoning is usually very nasty  but it can  can invariably be avoided with good kitchen hygiene - washing hands etc.. Also - how old is your computer device? Seriously consider an upgrade or at least save files and folders you do not wish to lose.

Cancer: June 22 – July 22

Your star sign is Cancer. Cancer is known as "The Big C". People often avoid talking about it but in your case it is probably good to talk. Make an appointment NOW. But do not worry overmuch as these days  there are effective treatments for most cancers.

Leo: July 23 – August 22

It's always a good idea to remember to lock your front door at night but the best of us can forget. Of course burglars know this as well! What a shame! But the good news is that there is much more to life than mere possessions.
Virgo: August 23 – September 22

We have all been warned about smartphone snatchers  but most people think, "It'll never happen to me!"  If you have insurance, it is highly unlikely that they will pay up if you were at all negligent.
Libra: September 23 – October 23

You used to think that there were no such things as ghosts but not any more. As they say, seeing is believing! Don't have nightmares!
Scorpio: October 24 – November 21

All your life you imagined that you had sweet-smelling breath but a casual remark with follow-up confirmation proves that you were wrong. Fortunately, halitosis is easily treated.
Sagittarius: November 22 – December 21

It's time to visit a dentist as a matter of urgency but there's little need to worry  as the removal of teeth under general anaesthetic is a routine procedure. Also, modern dentures are much better than old animal bone ones used to be.