14 July 2022

Hospice

On the way to see Simon, we took a short diversion so that I could bag a few more Geograph photo squares. Beyond the village of North Cave, the road rises as motor vehicles traverse the rolling chalk hills and dales that we call The Yorkshire Wolds. That's where I took my latest pictures though clouds muted the July sunlight.

Leaving Beverley, the clouds had grown more ominous and sure enough, for three or four minutes, Clint had to contend with a sudden deluge that was over soon after it had started. Someone turned the tap off and by the time we reached my home village sunshine was already evaporating the puddles. Clint had been in need of a good wash.

Simon had been assigned a new Macmillan nurse. The first one had only managed to visit him once in two months. The new nurse assessed the situation quickly. Speaking kindly, she offered him three options - stay at home with daily support in a hospital bed that would be delivered to the cottage, go into the East Yorkshire hospice till the end or go into the hospice for two or three nights of respite before returning home. Simon picked the the third option.

Consequently, the nurse phoned the hospice and was able to reserve a private room for Simon. Then she arranged for ambulance transport tomorrow morning. He was not bullied into this new arrangement. He picked it willingly himself though in his heart of hearts he must realise that he may never return to his rickety old cottage.

His woman friend who is currently staying in the village will be there in the morning to see him off in the ambulance with the bag that Shirley packed for him and his purple "Do Not Resuscitate" form and his negative lateral flow test.

The hospice website says this: "At our hospice we care for patients and their families with love, sensitivity and compassion so that their last days together may be spent with dignity and quality in a setting that feels like home."

It feels as if the time is right and I guess that it is really the best place for him. He will be safe there and good people will be watching over him as he reaches the end of his story.

Princess Diana visited the hospice in 1992

22 comments:

  1. I'm so very glad Simon chose this option. May this be the beginning of a peaceful end. <3

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  2. The hospice is the right place for Simon to go. He can be looked after until his end.

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  3. I am glad to hear this. Sometimes it is easier for non-family people to get results with a patient. Or maybe it was just a matter of your brother's struggle reaching a critical point and he was ready to accept help. Whatever the reason, I'm glad. And I know you must be relieved. I'm sorry he - and you - have had to travel this difficult and sad path.

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  4. So sorry. ((()))

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  5. Anonymous1:20 am

    Sad but best for everyone, including Simon. The nurse sounds very efficient and capable.

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  6. I'm glad he made that choice. My late husband didn't want to die at home and leave us with those memories, but changed his mind once he was in the h*ll of the "nursing home." We were happy to have him here with some support from Hospice.

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  7. This must be such a relief - for you and Shirley, for his friend and of course for Simon himself. Maybe heeding the advice of the nurse was easier for him than "giving in" to his brother's recommendations.
    The clouds make your photos all the more interesting. I like clouds.

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  8. Having volunteered at our local Hospice I think that would be where I would choose to be if in the same situation. It must remove a lot of worry from you, knowing he is being well cared for.

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  9. Peace of mind for you and Shirley and your brother will be shown dignity and be cared for.

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  10. Simon's decision must be a relief to you all, and that he has finally been persuaded to accept the help that's offered. May his end be peaceful and pain free.
    You and Shirley have been such a wonderful support to him, and now the worst burden has been lifted from your shoulders.

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  11. Magnificent service. Is it included in Social Security?
    Does it have any cost for the user?
    I write from Spain and here we have that service for the terminally ill but only if you really have life left.
    In Spain it is totally free.

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  12. I guess that gives you some relief too, for the time being at least.
    The panorama west from the edge of the chalk Wolds around N. and S. Cave is absolutely stunning in clear light, very difficult to photograph.

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  13. You must be so relieved. It will give you some peace of mind, knowing Simon is safe and cared for.

    Hope you manage your two nights away. It will do you good. X

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  14. How does that feel?

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  15. I'm so glad the new nurse worked out well and assessed the situation so quickly. I suspect Simon might not come home again, but people do surprise us sometimes.

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  16. It's got to be better knowing that he's in a place where his needs are being met and he won't be in danger like he was at the cabin. Would they really let him go back there after a few days' stay, as they say?

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  17. After experiencing my mom's last weeks and eventual death at home, I have come to see the value in hospice houses. It was physically and mentally grueling taking care of my mom even with the help of my brother, dad and a hospice home nurse. That experience has made me tell my wife that should I ever need hospice, have been sent to the hospice house and just come spend my final days with me while the staff did the physical stuff.

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  18. Sounds like a good plan for Simon, Neil. That nurse was just what he needed right now. It is a relief for you too.

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  19. Managing the end is what Macmillan and Hospices excel at. I wish Simon a peaceful and pain free time and you the strength to support him.

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  20. I think Simon will be much more comfortable and much safer in a hospice. He can be cared for and perhaps it will make a difference for him. I'm sure you two feel better knowing that he will be well cared for. And what the hell was wrong with that other nurse? Did Simon scare her off or did she just not care?

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  21. Simon's own choice and it will be best for him. A sad time but a quiet end as well.

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  22. The new nurse obviously knows her job. I am hoping that Simon feels so comfortable in hospice that he chooses to stay and be taken care of.

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