14 May 2020

Before

It was as if it happened in a different era of human history - our daughter's wedding. But it was just last August -  the 24th to be precise. There's Frances and Stew outside "The Cathedral of The Peak" in Tideswell just after the ceremony. To Frances's right are her six bridesmaids and to Stewart's left his six groomsmen -  including our Ian at the very end.

You couldn't have wished for better weather and you couldn't have wished for a happier wedding. It was all before the virus in a time of innocence. In those days you didn't need to shrink away from strangers or friends. You could dream and make plans. If you were so inclined you could hug. You didn't have to note the statistics of death and infection as days drifted by.  You didn't need to make masks nor wonder if you would ever travel again - to see the wonderful world or simply to enjoy nice holidays. That's how it was before.

And here are two phone pictures taken at roughly the same time in different places before cars transported everybody to the church. When will we see such happiness again? When will we know such innocence?

36 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. It's hard to seize it in a COVID mask Margaret.

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  2. No one knows. And that's the hardest part.

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    1. Now they are saying it may never go.

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  3. I'm hopeful that we will see the good times sooner that we think. Maybe that's just here as our population as well as being sparse is spread out.

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    1. Get your spare bedroom ready. Shirley and I are emigrating to Canada! Red Deer to be precise.

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  4. In 1918 there was a vast pandemic, millions died but somehow we have spent the last 100 years acting as humans: hugging, smiling, marrying, having babies, laughing. Our basic instinct cannot be overridden for long.
    It's going to be ok

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  5. Innocence is a good word for it, YP. I've had many similar thoughts. I take my spring/fall jacket from the closet for the first time this year and think, The last time I wore this was Before. I look at Christmas 2019 photos and think, That was Before - will we ever be together as a complete family again, with our 89 and 90 year old moms? even with the younger members of our family? I even look at work I did at my place of employment in early 2020 and see the date and automatically think, That was Before. There is a dark, severe line in all our lives separating Before and After - for me it was early in March. That's when the cloud descended.

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    1. For me it was Shirley's birthday - March 23rd. Then the line was very vivid.

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  6. What is the seventh person dressed as a groomsman, or am I seeing double? Yes, that was a glorious day and the pictures really capture it.
    I'm sure not seeing the end of this.

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    1. The seventh person was the bridegroom - dressed identically.

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    2. Get your facts straight, YP.

      Sally, the seventh person (according to YP's original narrative) is his son, Ian, of Bosh fame.

      U

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  7. I'm starting to see things like that too - Before and After. That's sad, isn't it. The wedding pictures are beautiful! My granddaughter was a bridesmaid in a pandemic wedding a couple of weeks ago. The bride and groom decided to go ahead with the wedding and were married in the church parking lot. The wedding party stood six feet apart from one another and the guests were in cars. I guess that is a wedding to remember.

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    1. But that seems very sad to me. Not how a wedding should be. This is the world of After.

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  8. The Before and After is definitely featuring in most people's lives these days. I even have realised that I look at films in a different way: Seeing people standing or sitting close together, friends hugging for a greeting and so on, I want to shout at them "don't!".

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    1. I know what you mean about "Don't!". The fear is everywhere in this After world.

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  9. Margaret's comment "Carpe diem!" does it for me, YP. I'm now on day 57 of self-isolation. I suspect that there are a good few more to come. Life's too short at my age not to make the most of every day within the constraints dealt us whether they be a terminal illness or just an inconvenience (with potential death) like Covid-19. To quote you "It's like we are extras in a disturbing film about an imagined dystopian future." I agree but I'm just thankful that I don't live in Somalia or Soweto. Just play The Glad Game, YP. It's more fun. PS Good luck with the courgettes.

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    1. The Glad Game...but where can I buy it? W.H.Smiths is closed and it doesn't seem to be available on Amazon. But I do take your point Graham. Trying to make the best of things.

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  10. I am just thankful that I had so many happy Before years. It must be hard for the very young to only have the After as their experience of life.

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    1. My daughter hoped to have a baby or two one day but now the COVID landscape makes me wonder if she will change her mind.

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  11. Like JayCee, I too, am thankful for so many happy Before years.
    I have sympathy for how this, if it goes on for too long or keeps re-emerging, may totally re-shape so many people's lives.
    In recent history lives were blighted by the first World War, swiftly followed by a devastating pandemic, yet somehow mankind survived.

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    1. That is a salutary reminder CG - providing a real glimmer of hope.

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  12. A new normal I guess.

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  13. What a great day. Everyone looks so merry and young and carefree!

    May those days return to us all, sooner rather than later.

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    1. Perhaps we will say for years: "I remember when...but that was Before".

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  14. What a beautiful bride Frances was, and the colour scheme is absolutely gorgeous. A day very precious to look back on. I think one of the saddest things is that this pandemic has stolen those times of greatest emotional presence from people; we live in a world made tiny through technology, but nothing can ever restore the joy of the once-in-a-lifetime celebrations that should overflow and effervesce with togetherness, hugs, laughter and in-the-moment smiles, or, more poignantly, nothing can ever restore those times when grief deserved and needed, soul-full expressions of sympathy, warmth, consolation and arms flung around in a very present compassion. Every day has it's moments to be grateful for and its own beauty to be seen, and slowly, slowly, our re-moulded, renewed ways of being will emerge, and, in the words of Julian of Norwich, "All will be well, and all manner of things will be well', but I also think that we need time to process, to recognise the trauma of it all, and to be very gentle with ourselves as we walk through the coming days. Elizabeth.

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    1. Wow! that is quite a comment Elizabeth! Thank you for writing it and leaving it here. I am honoured.

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  15. It does seem like another time, doesn't it? I can't imagine hugging anyone now. (Well, anyone from another household!) It's sad!

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    1. Your wrestling career is surely over.

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  16. We will -none of us- ever be back to normal. Oh, there will be a normal, but it will be new. Never the normal that was before. My son, the 47 year old Prince, has had to postpone his wedding which was to be in San Sebastian, Spain in a couple of months. They have decided, for the time being, to have the wedding, same time, same place, but in 2021. Let's hope for the cessation of this killer disease so that it can take place then and there.

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    1. Yes let us hope so. Your little prince got to 47? That must be strange for you and The King. I wonder why they chose San Sebastian.

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  17. Such beautiful memories to hang on to in these dark days. Every generation faces some crisis but the human spirit has the capacity to endure, survive, adapt and move forward. We have to live with faith, hope and love. Faith in science to find a vaccine, hope that the world will share that science and love for each other while we're on this journey. Your BBC news page has some wonderful examples to show us the way today. As always they move me to tears.

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    1. The BBC news website is like a friend to me. I see him just about every day.

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  18. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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